It’s Father’s Day. The first thing I did when I woke was go straight to the small framed Polaroid of my dad and me, taken on the last day I saw him. Father’s Day, nearly 25 years ago. There are a handful of other images tucked away. But that one, of the two of us, […]
Father’s Day Gifts (Good, Better, Best)
Good gifts Digital SLRs. Flat panel TVs. Exotic watches. Cordless drills, wrench sets, any kind of tools. Grills, golf clubs, silk ties. These are good gifts, aren’t they? Maybe even fabulous gifts? This used to be the lexicon of my month of June – whatever the latest and greatest gifts might be – for the […]
Rescuing dreams
There is something I am not seeing. There must be. I am unable to fight back the waves. I erect a barrier, and it holds, briefly. Then it crumbles, and I am knocked down and submerged. I pull myself up and rebuild, as another wall of water rises beneath a deceptive sky. And I am […]
What Do You Do When There’s Nothing You Can Do?
Sometimes, all you can do as a parent of teens is sit back and hold your breath.
Can We Ever “Set the Record Straight?”
Those who provide the comforting advice that “one day, your kids will know what you gave up for them” are well-intentioned, and even kind. What parent doesn’t want to believe that appreciation will come for all our efforts, at some point in the future? But I question the premise, the concept of eventual “justice” when […]
Parenting Is a Profession. Where’s My Paycheck?
Let’s stop devaluing the breadth of skills that parents bring to the table.
Next generation marriage
“I want to get married,” he says. The words are fired off into the air and seem to settle there, stark and defiant, as though some invisible structure of wires and pulleys holds the phrase in place so I cannot turn away. Then each letter tumbles down through the air, disintegrating. These are special effects. […]
Painting Over
Our walls, ourselves, our children.
Courage
Sometimes our children surprise us. Really surprise us. I remember my older son defending his much littler brother against a bully, a kid who was beefier than both of them put together. But my first-born threw himself into the fray without hesitation, and got the bully to back off. Flash forward nine years. That bully […]
Baptism by Bubble Bath (and Other Acts of Love)
I was thinking about my in-laws the other evening. I loved them, and haven’t seen them in nearly 10 years. They are a close knit family, grounded, smart, and unpretentious. We communicated in an amusing mix of languages, and got along well for more than a decade. I remember how proud my father-in-law was when […]