Best hairstyles for a woman at 50 or older? Let’s just say it. I am not the poster child for this one. My hair is both hapless and hopeless these days.
While I may not be sporting hair-to-the-derrière as I did at age 12 (very Cousin Itt) and nor am I attempting to rock a fuchsia streak (that was 25), I’m running through the reel of past hairstyles and yearning for a change.
Something fun, funky and flirty, but I haven’t a clue what!
The Story of My Life (and Yours?) in Hair…
Other than my Adams Family reference, my life in hair includes the Pixie Cut (against my will but very much my Mommie Dearest’s), the Bombastic Bangs (also known as Mom Messed Up Again), then those long-longer-longest locks, and in my mid teens, the I-Cut-It-All-Off-So-Leave-Me-Alone look.
I confess, at 16 when I took up the scissors and cut, cut, cut… it was very freeing! I wore my hair super short for years and I especially liked it in college, during the periods of time I lived in France, and also for the 12+ years I traveled back and forth on business.
Yup. Did that, too.
I went short again when I was busy with babies and work. A few years after divorce, I was instructed by my (then) 12-year-old son to grow my hair if I wanted to date. “Guys like it” he told me, and turns out he was right. I felt girlier and sexier. It became part of my post-divorce dating preparation and has been roughly chin length to shoulder length ever since.
Can Mature Women Wear Long Hair?
Recently, someone I met casually made a style suggestion. She thought I should consider cutting my hair short again, and that I had the right shaped face to carry it off. Ironically, my hair was longer than it had been in years (my “stylist extraordinaire” recently had a baby; she’s not available). I’ve been pondering allowing my hair to grow even longer, but a few nights ago I just grabbed the scissors and hacked off two inches. (I know, I know.) But it was bringing me down!
And that’s the issue with long hair for us as we age. Not only whether or not it’s healthy and lustrous, but if it seems to drag us down when our very faces appear to be heading south without our consent.
That short hair idea?
I find it most striking when a woman has beautiful cheekbones and chin line, or very symmetrical features. (I don’t have any of those at present!) Think Halle Berry. Think Dame Judi Densch. What’s not to love about those cuts on those extraordinary faces?
Still, I do believe that women who are tall enough to pull off long hair when they’re younger can pull it off as they move into midlife. I’ve seen many examples, especially at shoulder length, and some that are stunning and considerably longer. On that note, I’m recalling a deliciously rebellious opinion piece at The New York Times in 2010. Dominique Browning asks: “Why Can’t Middle Aged Women Have Long Hair?” Read it. You’ll enjoy it.
Still… Long hair around the face, particularly if it’s heavy, can drag down what’s already, well… dragging.
Jagged, Spiked, Layered, Tousled…
As I consider what I might like… just considering, mind you… I thought I would share images from Google just as my style guru Tish Jett suggested yesterday. I’ve been scouting pictures in the wee hours to find a cut that might suit in order to feel comfortable, attractive, and preferably upbeat. I am consistently drawn to the jagged, spiked, layered, tousled — all softly, please…
I believe that gorgeous hair on a woman of any age is an asset, and if you’ve got it, count yourself lucky and, yes, flaunt it!
Every now and then, I’m gripped by the desire to have a Proper Haircut (rather than taking to the scissors with impatience). And as Tish recommended, here are the Google results for “best hairstyles over 40” and “best hairstyles over 50” and, well… you get the drift.
One of the main differences in case you’re wondering?
Length, which you’ll notice is slightly longer in the 40-something group.
The 50+ group includes somewhat shorter styles and also more layering. I’m guessing this is for a number of reasons — to add thickness in the case of thinning hair, for one; and even more “lift” for another.
Bobs, Bangs, Wisps
Allure has some wonderful pictures in this slide show on flattering hairstyles for women in their forties. The bob – choppy or layered – is good on many women. I’m not a fan of “wispy” (unless you’re in a Victorian romance novel), but that’s just me… The layered shoulder length cut is quite nice (Allure shows Tina Fey).
This second set of images from Google, the 50+ demographic, features more variations on layering and bangs to break up the forehead if you’re not in the market for Botox.
I like many of these, though I still want to keep some styling options (able to pull it back, able to toss it around a little if I feel flirty).
Celebrity Examples You Like?
I’m not a big “celebrity watcher” — well, I do love my Real Housewives of NY, the OC and Beverly Hills… Speaking of which, though she’s taken some (mean-spirited) grief for having the same style for years, I have to say that I like this look on Lisa Rinna. We’ve seen variations on many celebrities, I think it suits her perfectly, and if I dared to ask for something with this feeling (but longer), I would.
Other celebrities with style to admire? Helen Mirren comes to mind, for her independent spirit and talent as well as the way she’s aging gracefully. (And yes, with a bit of help here and there.)
Susan Sarandon and Diane Keaton also come to mind.
A side note. Like many of us, I live in a rather “serious” world with my nose to the grindstone. I’ve said before (to my son), on the discussion of happiness, that I’m not unhappy. One of the activities that goes by the wayside too easily when you’re trying to get through the days and nights – whether walking colicky babies, struggling through college exams, juggling a heavy workload and domestic duties, caring for aging parents and working two jobs… it’s easy to lose laughter, a bit of frivolity, and… dare I say it… “girlish” fun.
For me, to remind myself that it’s okay to enjoy an hour pondering hairstyles or two hours wandering boutiques in a funky part of town, well… it’s not always easy. By sharing here, perhaps I give myself greater permission to enjoy just that.
As for celebrity models, I also love images of 84-year old model Carmen Dell’Orefice. Her silver-white hair is stunning and an elegant length that remains sensual and feminine. Poke around the web and check out some of the ad spreads she’s in. Gorgeous!
Visit this item at The Daily Mail — Carmen’s hair is beautiful in this Rolex ad.
Best Hairstyle Rule?
My “best hairstyle rule” at any age is this: Do what you love with a bit of “appropriate” mixed in. If you’re a trial attorney, I doubt an asymmetrical “bob” in a neon color is the right choice. On the other hand, if you’re an artist or writer or for that matter, a 50-something work-from-home mother of four teens, why not?
Confidence is hugely important in anything we wear and any style we choose.
Here’s an amazing photograph of Carmen taken in 2005. (She was 74 then.) Magnificent, don’t you think?
And as Tish would say, style is a statement of our personality.
- Who else is contemplating a change in hairstyle? Why? Why not?
- What do you like among these options?
- Do you like long hair on mature women?
I hope to consult those with expertise on these issues and offer additional resources as well. Today’s tidbit is a bit of quickie musing to let you know that I’m in need of a hair makeover as well as everything else. We’ll see where that leads… Anyone care to join me?
If you’re unsure of who Cousin Itt is… you can pop by this gif for a look-see.
Photo of Carmen Dell’Orefice, Wiki, License CC-By-SA 2.0. Image of Lisa Rinna, Los Angeles – Feb 22: At the Elton John Oscar Party 2015, West Hollywood, CA, BigStockPhoto.
You May Also Enjoy
Libby Wilkie says
Oh, the 80’s and 90’s curly head. I long for it. I have naturally curly (esp. in humidity) thick hair and that style was a godsend! No upkeep whatsoever and it looked fabulous!! Alas, that time has passed. I’ve tried to wear it on days when I just can’t deal…but no, it looks TOO awful to even leave the house! Thank goodness for straightening irons.
Another trend among the women-of-a-certain-age group is whether to go gray. So many pictures pop of of gorgeous tresses with lots of gray streaks. But, take a look at the skin on those faces! Really? They are 50-60? No way. Nice smooth skin and bright eyes. For me, I will continue to color my hair, and wear it above the shoulder!
D. A. Wolf says
I know what you mean about the smooth (young) skin and bright smiles, too.
I will also continue to paint my ‘few’ tell tale grays…
Missy June says
I’m guessing my hair to be about 50% gray these days … mousy gray, not lovely white or silver. I color it because the gray makes me just feel old. When I glance and see the grays, I identify as older, and somehow excluded from my own sense of self. I don’t know if I’ll ever give in and go fully natural. I’m finding two especially gray area on my temples to be more and more challenging to cover!
I like long hair, but mine doesn’t stay in good condition past my collar bone. So, I keep is layered at that level and most days just fashion some kind of undo. I need low maintenance, and since I only wash it every 2-3 days, this works for me.
I’ve had super short hair which was my favorite for function and super long hair and the longer feels more “me.” But, man, I miss the ease of short tresses!
Nancy Kay says
I recently got tired of the same old dependable mid length layered look I’ve been sporting for years
so I made a small change recently by wearing my bangs longer.
Just that simple change has made me feel better- and I think at the end of the day- feeling great
about how you look is more important than what trendy looks are featured in the women’s magazines
Missy Robinson says
I’ve played with bangs in the last few years, too. I’ll get real, actual bangs cut, then experiment as they are growing out. I can’t decide which I prefer?
D. A. Wolf says
Put some pics up on your FB page or blog, Missy. Show us… 🙂
Sue B says
I am not going to stop colouring my hair…well, maybe when I’m 80. With my redhead’s colouring, grey makes me look ill. And I think that hair of any length can be flattering if it’s healthy and well cared for. I’ve seen women of all ages with very long hair that could do with a trim to freshen it up. You should check out Lisa’s post over at “Privilege”. She recently cut her long hair and is sporting a just past the shoulder cut that looks wonderful on her. See it here at her blog, Privilege.
Change can be invigorating!
D. A. Wolf says
I’m not going to stop painting my hair either, Sue. (OK. Eventually, but no time soon.) You should check this out – from Tish — gorgeous pics of silver and gray hair styles.
Libby Wilkie says
My husband, who doesn’t mind whatever I do as long as it makes me happy, asks occasionally if I’m going to be blond/brown when I’m 90? Yes indeed!!!! As Missy June said, it comes back to your sense of self. In the end, it is what makes YOU feel good.
Cornelia says
I have never colored my hair and wear a variation of a sleek chin length cut as in those over 50 images. Sometimes an inch or two longer or shorter. My grays have come in fairly evenly, and it has never bothered me. I have been told many times that I do look quite a bit younger than my 59 years. Don’t know it that has something to do with it, but I am very thankful for good skin. 🙂 ) That said, many hair styles are flattering on older women so long as they are maintained properly. I get a cut every four weeks that will keep it in shape. And I always cheer a stylish woman with great silver hair… just because.
lisa says
Living with middle Missouri wind, my style needs to have that “windswept” look…..all the time! Highlights are helping to hide the gray. I also did the 80s perms…..yikes! 😉
D. A. Wolf says
I rather liked my 80s perm… 🙂 It was actually very easy to care for! Windswept sounds very romantic, Lisa.
lunaboogie says
Your hair history parallels mine! Especially the 80s perm. At one point I had an asymmetrical cut with “tails” (remember those) that was quite a romantic do, but not very practical.
I loved the long hair article. My hair is long. I can sit on it. And I am tall, so it is REALLY long. And I want to go longer. My style of choice? A classy bun held up with a hand carved and polished hair stick or fork. One of my clients used to call me the Vogue lady. So long hair can be worn tastefully. And at any age. I am 59.
I am graying slowly. A bit at the temples. My mother is 98 and still not fully gray so it’s in my genes. My darling husband can’t wait for me to go gray all the way. Probably not gonna happen.