I was immersed in an article on my iPhone, reading and savoring, the afternoon dropping away in silence, night soon to swallow the remaining light with its wintery chill and also its comforts – my hands, wrapped around a cup of Earl Grey; the careful review of my day’s accomplishments; a few additional hours of work, and then the warmth of my covers, settling at last into bed.
My house was hushed; this was an hour I had expressly given myself to unwind, a gift after a weekend of work.
Responding to the sound of an incoming email, I tapped to see the message that awaited. Color me cockeyed – I was jolted by ALL CAPS IN THE SUBJECT LINE, MORE CAPS IN THE MESSAGE CONTENT, and this cacophony was compounded by not two, not three, not four, but FIVE exclamation points!!!!!
May I say that the stillness of my mood was pierced, though no actual sound was heard?
That no human voice was attached is irrelevant. I processed the experience as noisy, rude, and interference, as disturbing as any other sort of shouting. I immediately deleted the email.
Was it from someone I know? Possibly. The end result is the same, of course. The communication was utterly ineffective. Whatever its intent, it gets an EPIC FAIL (excuse the caps).
The lesson?
Please… Do. Not. Shout.
Not on Facebook, not on Twitter, not in email, not in your comments and discussions online. Good manners are good manners… in the “real world” or our virtual communities. We who read are neither deaf nor dumb, and we don’t aspire to being either.
Caps and exclamation points should be the exception – for expressing outrage, jubilation, for getting our attention when something is absolutely critical. Otherwise?
Speak softly and carry some common sense.
I am now stepping (gently) down from my soapbox, and tending to some deadlines on hand. In the meantime, I hope that you enjoyed the guest writers for both the Mother-Daughter Series and the Father-Son Series as much as I.
My sincere thanks to the talented writers who participated. It was a pleasure for me to “host” you, an honor to “edit” you, and I extend the welcome to continue the conversation on topics of interest at your sites as well as here.
And remember, while silence may not always be golden, good manners – even on the web – are.
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Pam@over50feeling40 says
There has been a lot of email shouting going on at my place of employment lately … and I agree, even without an actual voice, many of us are weary. Your evening at home sounds like it was lovely. A little peace is always welcome.
Rudri Bhatt Patel @ Being Rudri says
Good advice, Wolf.
Five exclamation points and all caps to try to convey a point? You are right. This method of communicating rarely works.
Thanks again for hosting a compelling series. It helped me reevaluate my own perspective on both my father and mother. xoxo
Heather in Arles says
Busted. I tend to use too many exclamation points. Oops.
Beautycalypse says
Oh my, thanks for speaking this out. Seems we need some lessons on the good old Netiquette again, right?
D. A. Wolf says
Lovely to hear from you, Beautycalypse, as always. “Netiquette.” Yes, indeed.