Have you ever run out on an errand – something dry and uninteresting – that turned into an absolute pleasure?
Are there moments when you set aside your checklists and your jammed schedule, allowing yourself to be swept up in yes – the yes to conversation, yes to coffee, yes to the momentary marvel of unanticipated connection?
Morning, Like Any Other
I’ve been putting off an oil change, and I knew I couldn’t do so any longer. I was irritated at the hour it would take, the money it would cost, the inconvenience to my morning that was spilling over with items to get done.
But driving home from dropping my son at school, I saw that my old neighborhood garage which had closed a few years back had apparently reopened. I pulled in, said hello to the owner, handed over my keys, and headed to a nearby Starbucks on foot.
And I settled into a shady spot with a view of the road and a book I’ve wanted to read. Let’s just say, I only made it through a few paragraphs.
To my right, four well-heeled women were enjoying their drinks and chattering intently on a subject I could relate to – kids, high school, and the college decision process. I opened my paperback and sipped my latte, trying to concentrate, but it was difficult. Then I looked to the left. A silver haired gentleman was sketching. In his quiet, he was far more intriguing.
Every few minutes I stole a glance, curious about what he was drawing. At a certain point, he closed his sketchbook and we began to talk.
Unexpected Happiness
Oh, for the delicious surprise of a conversation! The simplicity of a question!
Suffice it to say, I was late to pick up my car, late to my morning writing, late to everything planned for the day thanks to a little dose of unplanned happiness – in the chance encounter, in the unguarded smile, in the genuine pleasure that comes from a creative personality, a born storyteller – not to mention a man whose lively works of art were utterly engaging. In fact, he went to his car and brought back a book of his watercolors – impressive work, and the discussion about art that ensued was delightful.
I left our encounter with a bounce in my step, reminded that remarkable people are everywhere. All it takes is yes – yes to that first hello, yes to a sincere interest in others, yes to our own curiosity, yes to being swept up in the moment because after all – isn’t happiness about good moments like this, when least expected?
We’re All Strangers at First
The irony in my morning?
I recognized the women who were seated to my right. One in particular is a former neighbor who lived nearby the “me” of my former life. Either she didn’t remember me, or she feigned not knowing me, acting as if I were a complete stranger.
The man who was a stranger was quite the contrast. He was open, charming, and without pretension. Now retired (best I can tell), he lives a few hours north with his wife, and he draws and paints – and I might add – quite beautifully. I hope he won’t be a stranger.
These are the moments I adore – people who reach out and remind us who we are, what makes us tick, that warmth can flow naturally and with no particular agenda. To a large extent, reaching out is as simple as Hello, what are you reading, or Hello, what are you sketching.
Rather than targeting happiness as a state of being or the result of techniques to create a happy infrastructure, I wonder if it isn’t as simple (at times) as unplanned acts of yes – a willingness to be swept up in yes to the unexpected, yes to an energizing connection, yes to taking a chance, yes to what you truly love.
- Do you still give yourself the unexpected yes?
- Do you stop and chat with strangers?
- Do you allow yourself the gift of the unscripted moment?
I adore those “yes” moments. My daughter had an unexpected afternoon off from school last week (graduation stuff didn’t take as long as expected) and she said, “Mom? Do you want to have some mother/daughter time?” Uhhhh – YES! Are you kidding me? What a treat. It reminded me that I should say “yes” more often – especially to my kids.
That is a great YES moment, Jane! I bet you loved it!
What a lovely story. I think we’ve all had these moments when life takes us by surprise. But it’s very easy to let them slip by unnoticed, without appreciating the simple joys they bring. My mom calls these moments “pleasant surprises” and they are always wonderful.
Love this, BLW. I had a delightful yes just the other night. A friend I hadn’t seen in years texted me. I was already out for a work related event (thank goodness hubs was home to stay with the little one) so we decided to meet (steps away from where the Beat poets hung out) for an Italian dinner. We ended up hanging out until midnight as our conversation took many twists and turns, deepening our friendship. It was wonderful.
Yes I know exactly what you mean. You sit there thinking, I *should* be doing X but actually life is sitting there right before your eyes, just pulling you in. I love the inadvertent sketch artist in particular – a great trope for modern life. Here’s to more of this!
Delia Lloyd
http://www.realdelia.com
Exactly! Life is right there – where we are – sometimes when we least expect it.
I enjoy the unexpected conversation with a stranger. I am genuinely fascinated with learning about people, their lives, what they do, what’s important to them.
An unexpected “yes” was my “yes” to a new job – I start on Monday! Caught me unaware and came down in a week. Yes to change.
That’s great news, Cathy! Congrats!
My favorite proverb, despite its incorrectness: Man plans, God laughs.
Wonderful, Wolf. 🙂
“Yes” to all! I love those moments… I’m a serious workaholic but I’ve been known to drop it all and go have a picnic on a Tuesday… Why not? La vie est trop courte pour être prise au sérieux… 😉
I love this BLW. In those unexpected moments, those exchanges of connection brighten our day. It’s where we can just be, pushing aside our routines. I am so glad you experienced it.
Those are the moments that help make life so sweet. We are creatures that crave connection (alliteration intended). I found the juxtaposition of the avoidable well-heeled ladies against the inviting gentleman artist an interesting analogy. I hope everyone can say “yes” to moments like these and be all the more richer because of it.
One of my most memorable encounters was when the guy who sat next to me on the plane started a conversation with me, back when we were both in college. It was a 17-hr flight, not including a 6-hour layover where we continued to hang out with each other, and we got to know each other really well. It made the long, arduous journey absolutely delightful.
The funny thing was, we went our separate ways after and didn’t exchange contact information, but I still think about him.