Commitment. An oh so elusive concept for many of us. But this year? I’m making commitment my bitch. You hear that, Commitment? Gotcha! You’re mine.
Commitment is my chosen “focus word” in the new year. Care to know why?
Not only did the word pop into my mind first thing in the morning a few days ago — either a good sign or a troubling one depending on the context — but its versatility suits many of us, wouldn’t you say? In my case, as I have been mulling how to approach the new year, tweaking this and that in my actions and attitude for a more satisfying result, I keep returning to the concept of commitment. And commitment is a fundamental element of success in any undertaking, don’t you think?
Dictionary.com tells us that commitment is
…the act of committing, pledging, or engaging oneself; a pledge or promise; obligation… engagement; involvement.
Hmmm. It seems to me that there is a crucial nuance that the aforementioned definition doesn’t capture, while the New American Oxford Dictionary more appropriately suggests the powerful degree of devotion, persistence and perseverance directed at one’s “engagement.” Consider this definition:
the state or quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity, etc.
Dedication. Right. Dedication to a cause or activity conveys a willingness to stay the course through bumpy waters, through uncertainty, through fatigue.
Don’t those words reflect the reality in most long-term relationships whether we are speaking of friendships, romance, or marriage? Doesn’t commitment involve navigating bumpy waters, uncertainty, and even tedium?
If you ask me, commitment is essential if you’re seriously inclining toward a “who” or a “what” that entices and inspires you. That said, it is also necessary to address a lessening or an absence of commitment and what that means – to both people and pursuits. (Naturally, any action that follows recognition of a person or activity that no longer holds the old magic involves consequences, often complicated consequences, that a responsible adult always takes into account.)
As for yours truly, all stilettos at the ready aside, I’m not concerned with relationship issues at this moment, but rather with what I wish to commit myself to and where I would like to concentrate my energies — without my usual tendency to spread myself too thin. Isn’t a new year the perfect time to assess how we spend our days? To examine whether the pursuit of certain activities has become routine and should be reconsidered?
In the past year, I have felt less committed to writing, but more committed to reading. By lessening my ritual discipline on the former I have been able to more fully embrace the latter. And let’s face it, a writer who doesn’t read enough becomes, in my opinion, less adept at writing.
I’ve also been far more conscientious about bringing excellence to projects for others and less so when those projects are solely for me. Am I capable of the same degree of commitment to my personal projects? And if I am not, can I change? Or is it the projects — the pursuits themselves – that must change?
If I cannot marshal the same sustained commitment for my own (former?) passions then perhaps, just perhaps, their time has passed. Perhaps I need to let them go. Or perhaps I simply need to refashion them.
What that means precisely? Oh, I have a few things in mind, and what they are isn’t the point. What is the point is my own attitude and acceptance of what matters to me here and now and moving forward, particularly as I continue to nudge myself out of old (bad) habits into new (good) ones.
I have made commitments to myself before, of course. Sometimes I meet my expectations and sometimes I don’t, like all of us. In the past year I made a commitment to a healthier lifestyle, a matter of necessity really, and while I had to relearn a number of life lessons early in the year, I managed to make major progress as the months rolled along. Specifically, I accomplished goals in key areas like healthy eating (thanks to discipline) and pain management (thanks to good PT at last, albeit interrupted repeatedly due to the inanity of the American health insurance system). I may write more about that in the days to come, but suffice it to say that I feel good about my efforts and I am grateful for an excellent physical therapist. (Let’s get real here — when you’re living with chronic pain, not only are you unhelpful to yourself, but you’re unhelpful to the people you love and the causes that you care about.)
I am also reminded how vital it is to take a longer (more forgiving) view on the time and energy to establish positive patterns as well as outcomes.
That’s what commitment is about, right? Dedication to a pursuit, to specific objectives, even through the rocky times and the false starts.
So tell me. Any specific goals you’ve set for the coming year? Might you also have a word or notion in mind that you hope to guide you as 2020 unfolds? Are you a traditionalist who makes resolutions and manages to keep a few? What are you looking forward to in the coming year? Any “commitment“ issues that you’re struggling with or seeking to pursue?
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I started my commitment to healthy eating and exercise in October. In fact I’ll be writing about it. I fell off the wagon during the holidays when my grandkids were with me. It’s hard for me to eat properly at Shake Shack or The Burger Lounge or ???? I did not make separate food for me. Oh, and I did eat those pancakes that my grandson and I made. Then again there were also those brownies we made. So I’m committed when I don’t have the temptation of the grandkids. Hurt my foot by over vigorous and ambitions walking up in the hills. But I will get myself down to the flats to walk again. So I’m with you. I guess I also should get back to PT. So I understand and I’m with you.
Oh, Sandra, you make me chuckle! Well, one good thing about being short, when you fall off the wagon there isn’t too far to fall. So I am with you on that one. Something else is different for me this year – for a change, after loosening the reins at holiday time, I didn’t beat myself up for it. That makes getting back to healthy eating and exercise so much easier.
Wishing you a very happy new year. And yes, let’s hear it for Physical Therapy that actually helps!
For some, getting out of bed in the morning takes commitment. For me, it’s getting back in the groove of writing… not my blogs… but writing a memoir. I’ve blogged for so long, it’s made another style of writing seem foreign and difficult, but I have committed to seeing it through. Hopefully it gets easier.
Brenda – You are so right about the way that blogging for a long period of time alters one’s writing. This too was one of the reasons that I have pulled away from such frequent blogging – in order to re-claim a writing process and style more appropriate for other venues.
Wishing you good luck with that transition and the commitment it takes. I am absolutely certain that your results will be brilliant. And wishing you a very happy and healthy new year.
I think I get over-committed and I end up staying in one unproductive place for far too long, instead of realizing the futility and moving on faster.
However, there are some healthy/positive habits that I used to do and that at one point or another fell by the wayside. I am trying to rejuvenate them. Exercising first thing in the morning is one.
Your comment reminds me of an expression that I heard some time ago: “Fail faster.“ For me, “fail faster” is a reminder to myself that if something is not working, even if it used to work, change it up. And try changing it up sooner rather than later.
In other words, the commitment (in some instances) needs to be to the desired outcome, not the familiar process.
I’m curious to know how exercising in the morning will work for you. That used to be my habit, for years, but in recent months I’ve been switching that up and exercising in the afternoon. Part of my trying a different time of day has to do with work rhythms but also attempting to improve my sleeping. (I always found that exercising in the morning gets it out-of-the-way and does tend to fire up more energy.) Please keep us posted on how that goes. And Bonne Année 2020 !