Perhaps it’s the natural consequence of social isolation. Or challenging times. Or the combination of both. I’d like to think it isn’t narcissism. But when “me me me” becomes the primary focus of your thoughts, and it spills over into every conversation, and you just can’t seem to shut up… well, that spells trouble.
In the workplace?
You may manage better there. You have specific tasks to fill your time and mental space.
A growing awareness: Despite my best efforts, I’ve been practicing a sort of “me me me” communication style that I need to shed.
Now, this doesn’t mean that I don’t wish to retain focus on personal and professional goals. And yes, naturally, there are individuals with whom I would like to discuss them. This doesn’t mean I haven’t encountered a few of those sticky life events that have had me preoccupied and needing a companionable ear.
But none of this means I have a free pass to talk talk talk on those occasions when I am (happy to be) connecting.
Because, let’s face it… a monologue is not a conversation.
What is important for any of us who find ourselves in a dwindling “real world” circle, often exacerbated by working in isolation, is the ability to truly engage. This means looking outwards, paying attention to others, and keeping “me” out of discussions where “you” deserve the spotlight.
Moreover, on those occasions when a little socializing opportunity pops up, girl talk (and the male versions) needn’t always dip into the somber or the serious. All the more reason that we seek to nurture different sorts of friends, including those we can hang with over coffee or a drink, as well as those with whom we cultivate more profound relationships.
On a pop cultural note — A few nights ago I caught Vanderpump Rules, and was amused at the reference to reality troublemaker Kristen’s “apology tour.” While this is highly dramatized television for our entertainment, I nonetheless appreciate the concept. And I find myself looking back on recent months and considering an apology tour of my own; I’ve been so lost in my “stuff” that I couldn’t get “me me me” out of places where that “she” doesn’t belong.
I have fallen down on this score, repeatedly, for at least a half a year. The reasons are irrelevant. I don’t care for this behavior in myself, and I’m working to stop it in its tracks.
What I know is this: I need to live my rule of listen first, talk second. I must say goodbye to “me me me” in a number of ways, and hello to you — whomever that may include — if “we” are to build and sustain real relationships.
Incidentally, on the subject of two-way communication, as I wish this space to interesting, lively, respectful, surprising, if possible of service, and always “real” — what would you like to read about?
Please tell me. I can’t promise that I can deliver, but I would certainly like to hear so I may try.
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