Are all stereotypes true?
When we generalize about people or a place, is that bad?
Is judging something as “bad” – bad?
Stereotypes and Generalizations
I recently wrote about why I find France and French men irresistible. Everything I wrote was based on my truths. As for the stereotypes and generalizations about French men, I stand by them, as examples of behaviors that I have personally experienced, and certainly more than once. I consider that I have enough information to acknowledge stereotypical realities, to sum up my own observations, and to generalize.
With 35 years of travel back and forth (as well as extended stays several times), I’m not speaking without some knowledge. I’ve lived, studied, and worked in France at various points in my life – in Paris, Nice, Provence, Normandy and elsewhere. Now, does that make me an expert? Does it mean that if I generalize (or stereotype), what I say is automatically and universally true?
Surely not! But my opinions are certainly more valid than those of someone who hasn’t had my diverse experience.
That said, there are a hundred destinations in France (at least) that I’ve never seen and would love to visit. And even more spots where I’d like to take up residence for a time, in a rented flat or small house. It’s clear that I adore the culture, that it suits me, and when I spend time in France I bring that positive energy to the experience. Who doesn’t enjoy a guest who is thrilled to be there, respectful of cultural traditions, and speaks the language?
As for my stereotyping, don’t we all use stereotypes, and therefore are potentially biased? More specifically – my generalizations? I consider that I have enough experience (beyond the superficial) to stand by my opinions. When stereotyping slides into judgment (or even prejudice), is that always a problem? Is judgment necessarily bad? Isn’t it just another form of opinion, and aren’t we entitled to our opinions?
Are Stereotypes Inherently Bad?
Stereotypes are based on elements of truth, on attributes that are observed and then used to classify. We use those stereotypes to make quick assessments. It’s natural for people to form opinions (judgments) from the information we have on hand. As for stereotypes – we’ve got millions! There are stereotypes about America and Americans, just as there are about France and the French, Italy and Italians, Germany and Germans, Canada and Canadians, and so on.
We also routinely generalize about men and women, ethnic groups, religious groups, and political groups. We toss out careless statements about kids, old people, nerds, preppies, stoners, jocks, ladies men, cougars – and so much more. We adhere to our stereotypes (until something changes them), and we ascribe judgments, often simplistically: good versus bad, like versus dislike.
Yet stereotypes offer no shades of gray, provide no narration, no explanation, and certainly no exploration.
When you judge an individual based upon a stereotype, do you know his inner world? The stories of his upbringing? His talents? His choices? His constraints? The psychological and intellectual terrain that comprise his experience to date?
Traveling at a Young Age
I have been fortunate in that I traveled a great deal internationally, and from the time I was 15. I’ve dabbled in many languages, speak a few, and have been chameleon-like in my ability to adapt to new countries and cultures. As I’ve lived in or wandered through France, Russia, Poland, Greece – or as I vacationed in Aruba, Jamaica, or Guadeloupe, I found elements of truth to the cultural stereotypes I held in each country. And I found just as many surprises, as I got to know individuals.
Stereotypes are partial truths about groups, generally without context; they are as false as they are true when it comes to individuals. So, judgments based upon stereotypes (with little to no additional information) will tend to be unreliable. Might that be what makes our judgments less than a good idea?
- If you generalize based on one experience, by definition, that is not a generalization.
- If you rely solely on “stereotype” of an ethnic or cultural group, a religion, or a political affiliation based on limited experience, you’re as likely to be wrong in your assessments, as you are right.
We all make judgments. Constantly. They are opinions that occasionally slide into prejudice. They are conclusions that sometimes serve to assuage us in some way. They are justifications for behaviors or actions. Judgments, in my judgment, are not inherently bad. What is problematic is the way in which we make them, wield them to damage others, or rely upon them inappropriately.
My World View on Short Men (or Napoleon?)
I generally prefer tall men, romantically speaking. Ridiculous, considering I’m barely five feet tall. But c’est la vie.
Once, I was involved with a short man. About 5’4″ tall, with elements of the dreaded “Napoleon Complex.” Being a petite woman, I’m very aware of the special difficulties in our world which seems to worship physical stature. So I understood the origin of some of his (over)compensation.
The gentleman in question was wildly funny, incredibly smart, spoke four languages, and… well… he knew a good deal about how to treat a woman. Yes, he was French.
He swept me off my feet, painted us a delicious future, then dropped me out of nowhere. Piecing things together months later, apparently several of us had succumbed to his charms. No, he wasn’t married, but one of the women found out, told us all, and that was that.
Did he break my heart? Well, let’s say he bruised it badly. He was a Frenchman in the US (so I stand by my French men are irresistible remarks). But seriously – does this mean I should never be involved with a short man again?
From one experience, can I say that all short men are not to be trusted?
I don’t think so!
Latvia
No, it wasn’t Colonel Mustard in the closet. It was our Latvian student, the 17-year old who came to stay with us, brimming over with a number of preconceived notions. About Americans, about the region we live in, and about the religion that we “sort of” practice. He was quite vocal about his ideas, which came from ignorance and stereotypes, based largely on stories he’s heard growing up, along with music and media.
Yesterday afternoon, he boarded a plane for home. I suspect he returned to Latvia with some impressions confirmed, and others irrevocably altered. I know he returned to Eastern Europe with the knowledge that he made two American friends, and one of them is my son.
As for us? We were the ideal environment for this very outspoken young man, in a relatively conservative part of the country. We are not “typical” in many ways. We’re culturally hybrid, reflecting two religious traditions, a single parent situation, and we mix our languages for pleasure. We get mad when we’re mad, we laugh when we find humor, and we take each day more or less as it comes. Study, learning, respect, and an open mind are the essential values in our particular family circus.
We are not stereotypical Americans. Yet we are the essence of America.
If this young man “judges” based on us, will that be a bad thing?
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I’ve loved your past few posts about generalizations and stereotype. And I LOVE your conclusion because you are not a stereotypical American, you ARE the essence of America. Beautifully put!
Wow! He’s already gone?? Crazy!!
As for stereotypes and generalizations. I think we may turn to these to protect us. Like, I hear many people glorify Europe as opposed to America. However, Europe has as many faults as America does, you know? I guess, though, they think the grass is greener? Anyway, I think you are right. I know that being a Mormon I often generalize my own CULTURE because I am familiar with it. I joke about it frequently. Yet, I don’t appreciate the stereotypes that come from those not of our faith. Often they are categorizing us without former knowledge, or based on one encounter with one Mormon. (I really appreciate that you defined generalities versus stereotypes!!)
As I have grown, I have realized that many of my stereotypes are quite wrong. I am still working on eradicating their negative images in my mind. It is a slow process, but I think it will help me and my children in the long run.
I believe that the more one is exposed to diversity on a personal level, such as someone like you, the less ability they have to judgmentally place people in boxes. Yes, people are structured by their families, their cultural upbringing, and their influentials, however they are unique to themselves first. I think, after reading your post yesterday, that you are in love with the IDEA of the stereotypical Frenchman, but those traits are evident in men from all over the world not because of their nationality, but because of their personal convictions.
Ah Steve, hélas, I am not in love with the stereotype. I am simply more comfortable in that culture I think, and probably much more flirtatious in French than in English. The combination makes for great sparks when I am in France. The men I’ve cared for (and who remain friends), in France, are all quite different from each other. But they are grounded in cultural values that are hugely important to me. It’s my reality.
We are all judgmental to some degree, whether we admit it or not. Stereotyping does exist. I considered your remarks to have been your opinions and not at all prejudiced. I enjoyed that post. And todays will have me reflecting for awhile.
Suzicate – you got it! My “judgments” are my opinions, and preferably with time and thought and experience. And yes, my “French men” commentary is exactly that, and note – one experience with one semi-rotten apple, Mr. American-Based-French-Napoleon, didn’t spoil my barrel.
I am guilty of forming and acting on stereotypes. Some of them are banal and relatively harmless; others are potentially damaging to the person stereotyped and to myself. Like labels (which Nicki @ Nicki’s Nook wrote about this morning), they can be useful to an extent. But I pity the person who is trying to overcome the stereotype associated with her. So much of history has pivoted on the inability of people to make judgments about individuals rather than groups.
We all stereotype. We can’t help but do that from the time we’re little. You could almost say that it’s a way to organize our impressions as we’re learning. So Kristen – yes – there are harmless stereotypes, and useful stereotypes, and dangerous stereotypes. And by dangerous, I’d say it’s those that prevent us from seeing the full picture, the individual circumstances, and the reality rather than a limited set of attributes used to categorize. Especially when we do so to dismiss or denigrate an individual or group, or to make ourselves feel superior.
Stereotypes are no fun for the target. I’ve been stereotyped plenty as a single dad who “must be” a) gay, b) incompetent, c) incapable, d) uninvolved, etc…
I think we are drawn to grains of truth when we want to see them. For instance, I happen to like dating latina women these days because I’ve had some great experiences with latina women who were sexy, vibrant, compassionate. Are all latina women like that? No. But I enjoy meeting ones who are like that. Are they only like that? No. But those things certainly turn my head.
Sounds like your head turns hard for some group of French men. Good for you! Flirt like crazy and see what happens.
DM and Linda and Amber – it does suck to be on the receiving end of the stereotype! No one wins when that happens. You miss out on getting to know interesting individuals. As for our Latvian guest, I imagine he’s home sleeping off his jet lag, with a broadened perspective on many fronts.
I think this is probably going to be good for Latvia as a whole! Who would dream that one little (big) Latvian would have the power to change so many minds? Well, his perceptions have been permanently altered, and he apparently made some permanent connection with your family, BLW, so, knowing what you’ve written about him, I’d say he’ll be vocal about it.
I feel like I don’t stereotype on an individual level but maybe on a group level, like about what a certain political party thinks, or whether I’d be safe, as a Jew, travelling to a certain region of the world. But when face to face with an individual I do believe all stereotypes are off.
Stereotypes, generalizations … our thoughts on where we are in our lives and where others are in their lives – or where we think they should be at times – all come from our experiences, our environment – both now and growing up, our families, those people and places and things that have molded us as we grow.
Are stereotypes and generalizations good? Sometimes yes, sometimes no. Are stereotypes and generalizations limiting? Sometimes yes, sometimes no.
It’s really next to impossible not to stereotype, or at least generalize, no? We just have to remember to look for the exceptions. Every time.
Wow, that visit sure went fast, from this end. If he’s formed any American stereotypes based on your homelife I’m sure America’s rep will be all the better for it!
15 days/nights of feeding a 6’1 200-pound and growing teen – breakfast, bag lunch, and dinner (and into the night) – uh – along with my own kid(s)… from this end… fast? Not so much. 🙂 But it was a terrific experience. We loved having him. And I hope he went home with a lot of impressions changed. My own experiences living with French families at age 15 changed my life. Part of why I agreed to do this, and I’m glad we did.
It’s human nature to stereotype, I think. It’s how we operate: we collect data, we make assumptions, we come up with a theory, we put that theory to work. The danger occurs when we aren’t willing to revise our theory when it falls a little (or a lot) flat. So we never date a short guy again, or we don’t go back to France because we didn’t like Provence. And that’s the real shame. (I mean, who wouldn’t like Provence??)
You are on a roll, chère Wolfe.
And thank you for that lovely introduction yesterday.
Have a lovely, peaceful weekend.
Et toi aussi, Tish !
Let’s take a step back and look at what stereotypes are. They are mental shortcuts, socially constructed personas and archetypes that help us quickly produce a mental picture of someone or something. So there is a purpose in some way, in creating a starting point for your thought process. Stereotypes wouldn’t exist if there wasn’t some kernel of truth in there.
But I wholeheartedly agree, stereotypes can go too far and be negative, critical, judgmental. They should be just a starting point that, through personal experience and education, you revise and edit to create a more accurate, complete picture.
Wolfie–
I’m very interested in the stereotypes the Giant Latvian had about Americans/people in your neck of the woods/etc. Tell?
Ah TKW, as for some of the preconceived notions of our teen guest from the Baltics, he was pretty outspoken on most religions, most ethnicities, and in general, the conservatism our country preaches.
He also poked fun at himself – his mutt status, as he called it, being half German and half Latvian. Thus, he had something else in common with my “mutt” children, who are the progeny of three languages, two religions, two countries, and two regions of this country.
My Italian husband encounters stereotypes and generalizations quite a bit. People will even say that he isn’t a typical Italian. Apparently nice, middle-class Italians from Italy don’t conform to the dominant stereotypes — the Jersey Shore/Sopranos idea of “Italian” or the flashy playboy type. It’s just a fact of life that most people’s ideas are shaped by media rather than personal encounters. And if they are fortunate enough to visit Italy, or another country, it’s usually a 2-week vacation with minimal and/or shallow conversations due to language barriers.
Do you find that the stereotypes vary by region of the US? For example, where I grew up, there were plenty of Irish, Italians, Armenians, and Greeks. There were no particular “stereotypes;” just people. I suspect where I live now (very few representatives from any of those cultural backgrounds), the stereotypes would be more prevalent. But that’s a guess. Your thoughts?
I’m Italian and I have found this article as I googled ”why do people stereotype Italians?”.
It seems to me that most people in the world have an idea of us, I’ve noticed it’s not just from Americans. Italy as a united country didn’t exist until late 1800s, it was composed of many cultural groups and after 150 years it’s still the same. The dominant stereotype comes from southern Italians (including Sicilians) who brought abroad their culture and Americanized it as, say, spaghetti and meatballs which are an American version of a southern recipe and doesn’t represent all Italy. If you think about it, can people from, say, Trieste, share the same culture of people from Naples? It’s not that middle-class Italians don’t conform to the dominant stereotype, the truth is all Italians’ stereotypes don’t represent northern Italy and a big part of the middle.
Your guess makes a lot of sense, but then again I know many people from the East Coast who relish the Goomba (spelling?) stereotype, even more so than the West Coast where there isn’t a large Italian-American community.