No time. No energy. No money. (And every other excuse in the book.)
It’s assessment time. Truth time. This is a period of transition for me, as I imagine it is for many of us who are between jobs, post marriages, about to enter a new phase of parenting, or dealing with other significant life events. So I’m looking myself in the eye – really looking – to determine if I have the guts to try something new. To go for what I want. To believe.
And then I run into the wall. Those pesky issues of survival. Time, energy, money – doing double-duty as reasons and excuses.
I’ve thought much more about risk taking in recent months. It’s a very different animal at 50 than at 30; there is richness in the broader perspective and appreciation for essentials, but life is more complicated – certainly when it comes to beginning new relationships. Likewise, when it comes to earning a living.
I’ve also wondered about who I haven’t met – yet. My nest will be emptying in the next year. How will I face it? Who may enter my little world? Will I be open and welcoming? Will I have the courage to make myself vulnerable? My deal breakers may be long gone, but will that make a difference?
I think about two decades spent raising a family. The challenges and sweetness of it. I think about self-sabotage – the legacy of familial conditioning, of social convention, of fear.
Sometimes, guts is about stepping off the merry-go-round that has dizzied us for years. Sometimes, guts is about stepping back on – even if it’s far more difficult than it once was. Guts may mean turning our backs on the carnival altogether, and heading in another direction.
In any case – it’s important to see where time has landed us, to register that even if it seems we haven’t gotten where we planned to go, there are positives in each journey.
- Do you have a taste for change?
- How much are you willing to risk?
- Do you have the guts to face down your demons?
- What about the guts to invite in your angels?