Teens are tots, with facial hair. We all know it. We just don’t say it aloud. Teens are tots, with facial hair. The proof? Erratic behavior, surly silences, and the ability to outsmart, outreason, outbefuddle and outlast even the most attentive and stoic of single parents. Why do I specify single parents? It’s not only […]
OMG – Call 911! Hot blonde with my baby!
OMG OMG OMG. Can I say that again?? Someone pass the oxygen. Now. Please. It’s bad enough that Big Brother’s been a lady’s man since he was 13, but now my little one? My baby? OMG.… 16 year old son: Mom, can I have a friend over this afternoon? Graying mother: Sure, but your brother’s […]
Fly, fly, fly on the Wall… Teeny Tiny, It’s a Ball…
Invisibility. It’s magical! No potions required. No electromagnetics. No green screen, no gizmos. I’ve mastered the art of invisibility! And it’s verrrrrry useful in life, as you become a fly on the wall, a speck of dust, or a passing whisper. When you need to be. Little people Technically, I don’t think I qualify as […]
Outnumbered! (Teenage parties)
Twenty rambunctious teens. One of you. Now what? Did you promise your teenager a party? Did you get through in one piece? Last year I promised my son he could have a major bash. He’d been doing great in school, had just returned from an overseas academic program, and he wanted to party. All night, […]
White Palace. Twisted Pleasure. Empties.
“Shall I get condoms?” Silence. “It’s like having band-aids in the house,” I say. “Good to have around. Just in case.” I turn to my son, see the grin, and make one of those critical parental decisions. The kind you feel in your gut. I’m long past embarrassment when I purchase anything. Well, almost. It […]
Light Bulb
You know that flash of recognition when you just “get it?” It’s almost physical – the sensation of understanding – really understanding an important piece of information, or the significance of an event. As if a light is turned on. That sort of epiphany can be good or bad, satisfying or bittersweet. Any number of […]
Life Before Google. SATs. A Great Omelette.
“Register for the SATs,” I said this morning. Again. As I was pulling laundry out of the washer, and shoving it into the dryer. “They’re coming up in early October.” “How do I do that?” he asks. My son is 16. He’s fixing himself the king of all omelettes. “Google!” I holler, from the next […]
I lost my summer. (Where did it go?)
Do Russkipreneurs somehow know I speak Russian? How many times do I have to delete their spam? Right. It’s not a conspiracy. They’re spamming us all. Do my teens realize the summer has disappeared? The past two months have been swallowed by a black hole. Right. I did it myself. So much for my daydreams […]
Internet intros: Meet and greet on Messenger?
Should your first meeting with a new man (or woman) be through video? And can you introduce your kids to a new love interest online, say – via Messenger? Online introductions Frankly, an online intro is a quick way to discern if there’s a spark with a possible online date. Sound cold? I think it’s […]
Passing the Torch: Siblings Helping Each Other
Siblings compete. They fight. At times, they resent each other. Whatever their relationship, wouldn’t we prefer if they helped each other out? Birth order and context come into play, as older children may feel they carry too much responsibility, middle children feel neglected, and the “baby” protests that he’s overprotected. If we’re lucky, our children […]