PJs on a chilly night? Check. Pizza right out of the box? Check. Bottle of wine and chick flicks at the ready? Check. What can I say? It’s the weekend, it’s a hectic time of year, and I’m feeling very Bridget Jones…
Of course, London isn’t just out the window behind my couch (though there is a city scene). There’s no cad of a boss I’m mooning or swooning over (are my swooning days a thing of the past?). And alas… there is no Colin Firth waiting in the wings in an ugly holiday sweater, or perhaps I should say, in a dreadful reindeer jumper.
Nonetheless, on a chilly night, sometimes a cozy moment of indulgence is just what the doctor ordered. Pizza, wine, and Bridget Jones in bed!
Most of the time, I am content to be on my own. In fact, it can be a tremendous relief after years (um, decades) of taking care of everyone else, even if you love your everyone else.
These days, I find myself grateful that I answer to no one, that the kids are raised at last, and that I can snuggle up to all the old films I adore and watch them all night if I like. No negotiations over a remote, a budget, a schedule. And no guilt over the pizza and Cabernet!
But as I continue to settle into my latest starting-over story — (will I ever unpack all my boxes?) — there are times when I can’t help but glance back and feel wistful. Are all my amorous adventures behind me? Are there still unexpectedly sweet surprises ahead? Are there meaningful connections to be made? Are there worthy contributions to be shared?
I tell myself that I am still young enough to be, well… restless. Up for a little mischief now and then, even if I need a long (three day?) nap after. Up for learning. Up for risk, for bravery, for giving of myself. But none of that can be assumed. Then again, what is?
For now, this is just right. PJs, pizza, Bridget, me channeling my own version of the inimitable Miss Jones. And as I sip my wine, I can do all the reminiscing and wishing and wondering I please, including…
What might Santa and the holidays bring?
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Please, sign me up for some me time with a side of pjs, a movie of my choice, pizza straight from the box and a cocktail.
The leftover pizza (for breakfast!) is good, too. ?
D.A., I enjoyed the Pajama Party of One, especially fun photo that you found. I spend 98% of my time alone and have for the past decade. For me, I have found my dogs provide me with the emotional support to assist me through my days and nights. No negotiations over the remote, what to eat, wine or no wine. Although the two of them are a bit needy and they depend on me, they do keep me in step with my self pace routine of life. Glad to hear that you took a break from the unboxing, organizing and typing! The new Grinch (in 3-D at the movie theater) was so funny and creative; it’s a must see! You never know who you might meet… wishing you happy holidays!
Ha! And happy holidays to you, too, TD!
I can so relate. I’ve always been the responsible one in the family (as all eldest girl offspring are expected to be) and I have always been the steadfast, dependable and obedient model child. But now that I live continents away, I find it comforting to not have to be responsible for anyone. To eat food near the sink. To stay in bed all day. And although I feel horribly guilty for enjoying the solitude and the lack of accountability, I feel like this time it’s time to focus on me, so I can do “me things” instead of “we things”. I’m trying to learn how to ignore the voice of my overdeveloped sense of responsibility and work on my me things first.