Are you over 50, unemployed, depressed and feeling powerless? For that matter, are you any age and feeling hopeless because you can’t seem to land a job?
The recession may be officially over, and for some segments of the population, things are looking up. But too many are still sinking or hanging on by the skin of their teeth. Long-term unemployment or underemployment has become a way of life.
This issue, for me, is personal.
I know what it feels like to be marginalized because you’re out of work. To be judged by others as if there’s something wrong with you. To grow increasingly depressed, demoralized, and despairing as three months of joblessness turns into six, and then continues for a year or more; as rejection after rejection becomes crushing, humiliating, and leaves you feeling worthless.
I know what it is to be holding things together — barely — wondering when the latest pieces of patchwork pay will fall away suddenly; there are no employment protections (or “benefits”) to kick in when they do.
All money-related impacts aside, you lose confidence. You wear out. You exist on the edge. You start to give up.
And you don’t even make it into the “statistics.” It’s been too long since your last employment relationship.
A Reader Reminds Us
On a related note, yesterday a reader, someone I don’t know, left a comment and asked me to please get in touch. When that happens, if I possibly can get in touch, I do.
Unfortunately, when I sent a note to the email provided, it was returned as undeliverable. Apparently, there’s a typo in the address. I can only hope she will return to the original post, read any responses, and try again.
What was the subject?
Right. The ongoing discussion of being 50+ and looking for work, 50+ and confronted with long-term unemployment, 50+ with the need to earn one’s living, 50+ and no money to retool, 50+ and nowhere to turn. For the specifics, please reference the comment by a woman named Cindy. She was laid off after a long career as a veterinary technician and continues to look for work with no success.
Now, it’s easy to make well-intentioned recommendations. However, many assume there is money to pay for additional training, there are no health obstacles to limit one’s options, there is access to transportation, and of course, a decent roof over one’s head.
A stranger might advise you to stay open and flexible, consider a move if it makes sense, and per our pop culture panacea (positive attitude) — keep a smile on your face and “everything will be fine.” How often I’ve heard that in the past half dozen years or more. How often I’ve grown more discouraged when I’ve heard it. How often I wanted to protest in response!
It’s hard to smile your way through a stack of bills, your kids needing something you know you can’t afford, your debt deepening, your past work experience as good as it gets — but you, never in the running. It’s hard to fight your way back when easy assumptions don’t hold up and you can’t get past the prejudice of ageism. And age bias in the workplace is real.
Workers Age 50+ Continue to Struggle
This New York Times article reporting on older workers notes that the post-recessionary recovery continues to leave the 50+ segment behind.
Elizabeth Olson writes:
Long-term unemployment among older workers has been a major concern. On average, 45 percent of job seekers age 55 and older… have been looking long term, according to the federal Bureau of Labor Statistics, which defines long term as 27 or more weeks without work…
Ms. Olson cites an AARP report on a study conducted in October 2014 (participants ranged in age from 45 to 70), and she quotes its co-author economist Gary Koenig:
… the study’s results were “a mixed bag. You have about half who remain unemployed or have dropped out of the labor force, and the other half who have been able to find new employment, but conditions of that employment vary.”
And the follow-up? And concern about where we will be in a year or two or five as the impacts snowball?
Occupations With Growth Opportunities
Also noted in The Times article:
The occupations growing the fastest, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, are personal care and home health aides. Other growing job areas, which require specialized training, are nearly all in the health field and include occupational and physical therapy assistants, physician assistants and genetic counselors.
Of course, you have to be physically fit enough to perform these services, have the funds to acquire new skills and certifications, and have access to public or other transportation, which means money for a car, insurance, and gas in order to commute to deliver these services.
Even if Cindy wished to transition from her veterinary background into another area of the health field, how could she do so with no transportation or money to retool skills? How could she feel anything but powerless, like she has no reasonable choices?
It’s worth mentioning that The Times article speaks to the issue of age bias, to the importance of using contacts while job searching, and to the successes that many 50+ workers are having by shaping their work lives in some independent fashion.
One Layoff + One Divorce = One Decade of Crazy
Let’s take off the pretty masks for a minute, shall we? These days, I’m not as job-scared as I have been in the past, but that doesn’t mean it couldn’t all change tomorrow. I am not in an “employment” relationship, I am constantly on edge about losing the latest project (to a younger resource), and that means I’m a phone call away from floating in a sea of worries as I have been off and on for years.
The worst of my job-scared days? They continued for a full ten-year period, and realistically, I doubt I will ever feel “safe” again. And this is especially true as the years pass.
For one thing, the insecurity of being what is (laughingly?) referred to as a “portfolio worker” sustains an undercurrent of stress that is impossible to explain if you haven’t lived it. And yes, at the moment, I have work coming out of my ears and I couldn’t be more delighted. But it’s temporary work. I could be out of work tomorrow.
I’m also perpetually physically tired, have virtually zero time for a relationship, too little time to keep a stream of leads in my pipeline (another concern), and find no alternative but to continue as things are.
When you don’t have so much as the pretense of a secure “job” — or for that matter a partner, spouse or other family member contributing to the household — it’s virtually impossible to let go of the fear of your income disappearing overnight. The prospect of another long, dry spell with no money coming in is terrifying. And reserves? Cushion?
If this has been going on for a few years, those rainy day savings are long gone.
Overqualified, Over-Educated, Over 50
Despite my fancy educational background and shiny corporate career history, for a number of years I was unable to obtain work that was even remotely close to using my skills. Paying me a living wage? Let’s not even discuss it. I must have applied to 100 positions over the course of several years, attended the usual networking events, and schmoozed every contact I could come up with.
No go. I suffered from the three O’s: Overqualified, Over-educated and Over 50, though I may not have looked it. That last? If you ask me, age was the kicker.
Throughout that period, as post-divorce skirmishes continued to flare (further complicating matters), I nonetheless took every project I could eke out of the woodwork, supplemented by debt.
Hello, bank bail-out? How about a few bucks for those of us who foot the bill in tax dollars?
The Borrowing Trap
Now and then, an acquaintance will make an off-hand remark about those who borrow money or live on credit cards. The assumption is that credit purchases are frivolous, or that the person who racks up consumer debt does so out of irresponsibility and poor judgment.
Never assume.
Yours truly?
I borrowed to put food on the table. I borrowed to pay for school supplies for my kids. I borrowed to enable them to take advantage of academic opportunities that they earned through their own hard work.
I also counted my blessings. While I had no family to assist, my kids were healthy and doing well, I was basically healthy despite chronic pain, and I was able to use credit. Borrowing is a double-edged sword of course, especially if it continues for an extended period.
But for my little household, debt was the only path to survival. For all I know, it will be again. And then what? My own personal big crash?
Fighting Your Way Back
These days?
I still live on a tight budget, I dream of recovering from the years of financial devastation “someday,” and I take every gig I can get.
Willingly.
I’ve gained new skills along the way and continue to refine them, I’m always looking for another project and thrilled when I nab one, and I’m accustomed to a 12- to 14-hour workday. I put in long hours throughout my traditional corporate career and I have no problem doing so now. In fact, I’m grateful for these workdays and I take none of them for granted. Moreover, I suggest that few of us should take our sources of income as a given.
You know the expression — “There but for the grace of God go I.” Misfortune can visit any one of us.
Layoff. Accident or illness. Gray divorce.
The phone call or email with no warning, saying “you’re done” as you’re replaced by someone 20 years younger.
And yes, I’ve internalized the wisdom of this little gem: “If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.” But I also know it isn’t always possible, and the secret to success is not as simple as hard work. It’s aided by the assistance of others, not to mention — luck.
What that means? I live in fear. I worry. Without an “employment relationship,” my situation remains precarious, especially as I grow older. And let’s not forget — in the U.S., without an employment relationship, there is no short term disability if you’re sick, no unemployment benefits (however meager) when you get the proverbial pink slip, and accessing health care becomes a whole other challenge unless you have an employed spouse with healthcare-related benefits through his or her employer.
Unemployed and Depressed
Forbes reminds us of the clear links between unemployment and depression, which isn’t to say that underemployment or hating your job is a picnic.
Forbes staff writer Susan Adams cites a Gallup poll as follows:
“The longer that Americans are unemployed, the more likely they are to report signs of poor psychological well-being,” says the study. “About one in five Americans who have been unemployed for a year or more say they currently have or are being treated for depression — almost double the rate among those who have been unemployed for five weeks or less.”
She goes on to note:
The long-term unemployed, unfortunately, have good reason to be depressed. They suffer plenty of discrimination in the job market. A 2012 study by economist Rand Ghayad found that employers preferred candidates with no relevant experience, but who had been out of work for less than six months, to those with experience who had been job hunting for longer than that.
That’s a striking statement, don’t you think?
I’d say it’s right in line with The Times column, wouldn’t you? So next time you’re about to judge, dismiss or ignore the acquaintance who finds himself or herself in this position, kindly reconsider.
Unemployed or Under-Employed? Over 50?
How many of you have found yourselves laid off and unable to get another job? How many of you are struggling in midlife to create a career where once you were responsible for taking care of a family?
- How many of you have knocked on doors and connected until you’re blue in the face, only to give up?
- How many of you have drained away any savings you may have had or incurred crushing debt?
- Have you had more success at creating new ventures for yourself — a business or freelance work?
- Were you able to rely on the assistance of family or friends for a temporary period?
- If you’re over 50, have you found it harder? Have you had an experience similar to Cindy’s?
I’m certain that many of you have fought your way back; I’m still fighting after years, but I have seen progress. Slower than I’d like, but progress all the same.
My concerns: how tenuous my situation remains; how quickly any progress can be wiped away. And if it’s this hard to cobble together a living in my fifties, what happens when I’m over 60?
Do you share these concerns? Have you tried something completely out-of-the-box? If someone helped you out, have you paid it forward by making connections for others?
Please do read this comment from Cindy. I have responded as best I can. I’m sure she would welcome your suggestions. There many other stories and comments. I’m certain those individuals would welcome your suggestions as well.
A Note on Despair
To be in this position — wanting to work, needing to work, knowing you still have much to contribute but never getting a foot in the door — is deeply frustrating, horribly depressing, and leaves us feeling impotent. Add up these elements and you have the formula for despair.
It’s brutally hard to fight your way back from despair. But sometimes, an act of compassion can help.
I’ve been on the receiving end of those incredible kindnesses — from strangers, from readers, and from one friend who has been living on the edge herself for years.
One small act of compassion can breathe new hope into the worst situation. And here’s what I know with 100% certainty. We may be unemployed, we may be depressed… but we aren’t powerless if we come together and try to help one another.
So if you have any ideas for Cindy, please offer them. And keep in mind that only when we have greater visibility — politically, organizationally — can we harness the power we need to create change.
For now, do what you can. If you know someone who is unemployed or underemployed, whether in an actual employment relationship or working as an independent (contract or freelance), please keep them in mind. Offer a suggestion — without judgment. Make a connection on their behalf — and let them know. Help by thinking creatively — and sharing your ideas. It’s often difficult to think outside the box when you feel so long shut down, closed in, and deprived of the light.
If you would like to share details of your story — concerns, special challenges, questions, suggestions and successes — or connect with others, please email startingover50plus @ gmail.com.
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I must have applied to 100 positions over the course of several years
For my current job, I applied to over 100. I got maybe seven phone interviews, three in-person interviews, and one job offer. For the job I got two years before that, I had about the same numbers.
Job hunting is a miserable experience.
Yes, I agree, gold digger. If I may ask, are you in a “job” job now, or some variation of self-employed?
I am 58 years old, I haven’t been employed for 7 years. I see the common threads of discouragement and depression among your posts originating from obviously intelligent and talented people. I’ve often wondered if there were a method of organizing people like us into a profitable entity.
Have had the same thought for the last 5+ years. Even at 61, newly divorced, selling the house I’ve been in for 24 years, unemployed and consulting gigs dried up, facing a very tight budget, and negative cash flow; I actually feel there’s some way I can turn on the lights in “my dark room” and make something special. If one can avoid a pity parade it seems there is something in pooling resources and brain power. Still looking. Work daily to maintain optimism. Fishing and golfing is only temporary relief.
Living like this will just bring down my family.
I’m getting tired of the constant company restructuring statement. Your job has been eliminated. Age discrimination.
I’m better off dead. That way the insurance I have been laying on for years will be payed back.
I understand exactly where you are, no name. I wish you had left a name, some sort of name, and more importantly an email at which you could be reached. There are so many of us in this situation. I’m not entirely sure what it will take to improve it, but I know that to give up is never an answer even as I fully comprehend where you are. Please return and respond.
I’ve gotten all jobs but my first by networking. I was told at my last two corporations that they get 1000+ resumes for each opening! Knowing this, you quickly understand the need to network, especially if you have a hit against you like age.
Really good point, Jim. The number of applicants HR has to sift through (or their software does) can be overwhelming. Thanks for this critical reminder.
Networking works if you happen to be representative of a (relatively) valued community. Having multiple discernible social strikes against you can make networking exhaustingly unproductive. There are reams of studies published in peer-reviewed journals that demonstrate that the way networking works (or doesn’t) for job seekers is based on the communities those people belong to. For those without the right kinds of connections–and these aren’t achieved merely by attending the “right” universities, being active in professional communities, joining professional organizations and societies, and tactfully but persistently reaching out to stakeholders–networking very frequently does not confer any hiring advantage.
Worse, that the Supreme Court recently made it even harder for applicants to substantiate claims of discrimination (age…) only exacerbates the severely underreported un- and underemployment issues.
I completely agree. Unfortunately, this is as good as an economy as we’re ever going to get, so for many people, they will never get another job again. How someone in their 50s can live the rest of their lives with no job, is truly hard to imagine.
Your lack of imagination is a blessing. I am living the reality. It is too much to bear some days. It is painful beyond words to be cast aside like so much garbage with experience and energy to offer. And society does not care. I’d love to know how many suicides are precipitated by the shunning and unjustified firing of “older” workers. I doubt that it’s rare.
Searching for articles on >50 and unemployed. Found this one which was on point. Networking is great if you have the right last name, in a town with old money for which you can mingle with the buckaroos, or can afford to take people to coffee (suggested by one article) to discuss the current state of jobs while they sip and partake on your dime. Unless most people see something in it for themselves, few are willing to help. I have good skills, solid education, and have completed recent education to update what might be thought of as outdated. I will be very glad to take social security at 62 (3 yrs away) and work in jobs that may not offer much pay, but will offer peace and joy. Just this week, ConocoPhillips, General Mills and several other companies have announced layoffs. General Mills, in fact, is closing several factories in the U.S. and one in Brazil. Ironic how no mention was made at the DNC of these developments. Age discrimination is alive and well. I truly feel I could get multiple master’s degrees, devote myself to learning a trade, be tops in productivity–and none of it would matter. What I’m seeing repeatedly in Denver is “cheap” rules. One employer even told me, “we’re not looking for excellent, we only need average”. I’m pondering how to hone in on “average”. I’m disappointed in my situation, but even more disappointed in how the race to the bottom has accelerated in our country.
At 55 years of age, I never thought I’d be in this situation.
I’ve worked since I was 15, went into the grocery business for a well respected, local grocer, became one of the few who not only excelled in multiple departments but I took pride in the fact that I was the only night time grocery manager within the 23 stores, then it all came crashing down due to a buyout, now I’m not wanted except to work for $10 a hour when I used to make $20.
As I noted in a recent post, “reinvention” is the name of the game these days. All this excitement about innovation and new technology — and yes the now likely-to-happen new trade pact — all seem to overlook the impact on real people, who really want to work. While the advent of more highly skilled robots is exciting to some, the truth is that it will likely mean a loss of jobs and a big pay day for a very small group of people. It makes me so sad that we have no social contract in this country. These new “innovators” feel no obligation to provide jobs or take others along with them.
Today’s Supreme Court decision that maintains the Affordable Care Act was a tiny victory when you compare our “safety net” with that of other civilized countries.
And the widespread inability to get hired when you are over the age of 50 completely baffles me. The entire process is now completely impersonal. The last job interview I had was a phone screening done by a very young woman who told me she wasn’t a full time employee of the organization, but a contractor. Even worse, some “technical glitch” prevented her from having my resume in front of her during the interview, which was a bunch of very canned and stale questions. Clearly, she was just going through the motions because I had been recommended by someone who knew the organization’s CEO.
I know that none of this helps someone who needs work now, today, but if we don’t all band together, support unions and speak out, our country will continue on its current path towards being a playground for the elite and leaving the rest of us to fend for ourselves.
Those very important comparisons that few like to make, and our paltry “social contract,” as you say, Judith. And your contract phone screening experience rings an all too familiar bell.
I’m with you on all points. Perhaps when we put a human face on these issues – Cindy’s story or anyone else’s – we may begin to understand how lives are impacted. All I can think to do is (a) to vote my conscience; (b) to keep speaking my mind (through writing); and (c) to do whatever I can, one person at a time, giving back or paying it forward.
Others have done it for me.
Your theme, DAW, about trying activating your own compassion, despite feeling so very dead inside, has touched me this morning. Thank you. When we are ‘shut down, closed in, and deprived of the light’ it feels like there is just no fuel to keep trying, to put one foot in front of the other, to search for new solutions, make new approaches let alone to give anything to anyone else. But I think you are right that this would make fuel. All around.
Important to pull head out of own bum. View’s not good in there.
I agree 100%, it is so sad but I agree if we don’t come together we are going to see a huge increase in homelessness, and while the government is fighting over things that don’t matter this issue is important. I’m praying that God opens a door for over voice to be heard. I cannot tell you the nights that I cry myself to sleep and praying asking God to order my steps and believe in my heart that the door is about to swing open. I’m trying to put together a survey for people to take and get my local TV news station to do a segment on this issue if you read this and would like to help please reply. BE BLESSED
Very powerful and touching piece. My heart goes out to Cindy, and others in her situation and I don’t believe for a minute that anyone can’t be a victim of age bias. I know this will stay with me and I know I’ll think about it if I have a chance to offer encouragement to someone who is lost in this “un” world.
You are doing a lot by responding as you have and inviting others to do the same. Thank you.
Thank you for your good words, Susan.
Thank you for being open minded. So many people figure that you must be defective if you are older and unemployed. The reality is that so much of it depends on luck and timing. Regardless, many will continue to disdain the older unemployed worker. Some people only believe in bad luck when it happens to them.
Your final observation, Mary Lee, that some people only believe in bad luck when it happens to them? Oh so true.
That is true. Some only believe in bad luck when it happens to them.
Some only believe in illness when it happens to them.
And some only believe in age discrimination when it happens to them.
In the internet age any prospective employer can seek out your date of birth and not hire you on the basis of your age. This is a current fact of life.
THIS was a VERY KIND article for YOU to WRITE on behalf of CINDY and others that maybe struggling!!!
BRAVO To YOU for trying TO HELP HER………….. I hope she checks BACK! How frustrating for you to have received that email back!
I am off to read Cindy’s comment. If she lives in NORTHERN CALIFORNIA I will GO CHAT With MY VET!
On another note we have a male friend who lives back East who has been out of work for 6 years! They had to sell their house and ended up divorced……… TWO BOYS who are in private colleges…………….. he just got a job making sandwiches.
It is curious that those younger decision makers are blissfully unaware that they are building karma for their own futures. Those that build and support a society that only values and selects youth will one day find that they are also excluded from it. Thanks for a great post. I hope Cindy and those who share her circumstances find an employer who values their contributions soon.
I’m 53 and have been out of work since April 2014. My unemployment runs out next month. Being too depressed to look for work is a concept that I can strongly identify with. Occasionally I see opportunities posted but I don’t dare hope that I will ever be called for an interview. I am starting to consider taking my own life. Why shouldn’t I? I’m single and have no dependents. I would not be missed.
Dear Robert,
You would be missed. We all have a purpose even if it is hard to find at times. Both my husband and I recently lost our jobs and we are both over 50 so I understand a little of how you feel. It is hard to keep the faith but there are so many options in life beyound suicide. We have sold our home and are basically starting over.
Thank You for replying to Robert. Mostly, I never know what to say. IT’s so devastating when someone commits suicide. It makes me feel so helpless and want to reach out, but not sure the right thing to say.?
…in the same boat, and others dont know how it is unless you’ve experienced what we’re feeling
You are so right about that, Chester. I wish I had more to offer than my understanding and my wish that things will change for the better.
If you come back and read this, Robert, keep fighting. Don’t let them win.
I feel your pain. I hope you are still alive. If not, I would not be surprised nor would I blame you. Life can be so cruel.
Dear Robert. I honestly thought I was the only one who felt this way. I am lying in bed this Sunday morning sobbing because I feel like I am at the end of my rope. I too am now single with no dependants. Some people might miss me initially but the overwhelming fear and sadness I am feeling overrides this. I hope you are still alive so that you know that you are not alone in your moment of despair.
Dear Robert, I hope you are still with us but I do understand how you feel, I also am experiencing similar thoughts.
Donna, I can relate to you as well feeling like I’m at the end of my rope. Since losing my long term position I seem unable to hold a job. It takes a while, I get an underpaying position and then the B.S. starts. It’s awful to be bullied in the workplace while at the same time thinking, “what’s wrong with me? Why can’t I make this work?” My attitude is shot after having to sell my home or lose it and then having to live in a ghetto rental. Now I have been “laid-off” again and don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to pay the rent here. What happens then? Trying to hang in there till next September when I can collect SSI and hopefully work part time. I really don’t want to be homeless, the thought terrifies me. All this after working 45 years. It’s baffling and frustrating……………
Dear Donna and the rest of this board, I know the despair you feel. I was kicked to the curb like a dog by my company after many years of good service. To add insult I found out later the manager that fired me made jokes about getting rid of me. Since 2009 I have worked in low wage, horrible jobs where these employers treated us workers terribly. My current job is working in a back breaking job in freezing temperatures. The hours are terrible with me working till 9 pm only to wake up at 3 am to start a new day of hell. At over age 50, my body is starting to break down as well as my mind and soul.
If I were single I would get my certification to teach English overseas and live in a cheaper country with a better climate and beaches, That may not appeal to some people but it is one way of thinking outside the box. Not all countries treat their citizens that are older as badly as the United States does.
My focus is on only two things. Finding work as a self-employed freelance writer and moving to a warmer climate. I may never make that much money but no one will own me anymore. This is the kind of career I can do well into my 70’s or even later. Corporate America careers will kill a person so why even bother looking for one anymore. Why even give them the chance again to get rid of us so as to destroy our self-esteem, hopes, and dreams? We gave our companies our best so, in my opinion, they don’t deserve us.Let them hire people half our age who show up late to work, have a problem with authority and play games on their cell phone all day.
I’d hate to say it, but teaching English overseas also has age limits. Most over 50. I looked into it. sigh and I am single, no dependents. But I sure wish that I had someone to share in this pain/rejection with and to help pay any bills. Robert, there are many of us right with you. I can’t take my own life, too chicken. But at least once a week, I wish that I was not here anymore. There is no need. I have wonderful children, grandchildren, but they don’t understand. Like someone said, you don’t understand until you have been there. It is a crazy world that we are now living in. I have one month left of rent money. No savings except for a very small 401k. Then what? No home to sell. Scary. Double masters, speak 4 languages, etc… yada yada yada. It does not matter. One cannot survive on flipping burgers. Not sure what to do. Really.
dear robert: I have been out of work since may 2015. I am 53 yrs old. i hope you’re still here too. its not easy for us i know. i keep looking but no luck. i had a seasonal job in december 2015 but thats it. don’t worry, you are a very brave person. just keep trying something will happen. I’m going to keep trying even if i really don’t want to. take care.
As bad as it is being rejected for a paying job, I think it is worse when you are interviewing for a volunteer position that you don’t really want (by someone who is just out of college) and then you get a letter that “we are going with another candidate.”
All of this makes me really glad I did not send a suck up email “thanking them for meeting with me.” Actually, it would be more like [sarcastic] “thanks so for much for not throwing my resume in the trash — which you should have done because you could have Googled my age and saved yourself the trouble.”
No, I did not want the position because it was in one of those “millennials club shared working spaces” with no designated computers etc., working from whatever clean desk space you can muster up with either your own laptop or one they dig up for you (like I need to lug a laptop around with me all day and not get paid); but it is annoying to be officially declared “not good enough” to work for free. The main reason they do not want me I am sure is that I am not a “fit.” But I will never be a “fit” as long as I continue to be old.
I currently do have a part-time job, but like the author of this article, I am looking for MORE because I never know when my income will be snatched away from me. I would work 80 hours a week if people would hire me.
But as it is, I am not even good enough to work for free and that is a slap in the face.
As the author of this article, pigbitinmad, believe me, I get it. It’s galling. It’s insulting. It’s bad business. And yes, the “not a good fit” line is the way organizations get around age (and probably other factors as well). I guess all we can do is keep looking, always looking, always connecting — and keep talking to each other so we might possibly help connect in ways that are helpful. I wish you luck. Stop by again, okay?
Ha! I also “applied” for a volunteer job and was rejected. wow. can you believe? How can you survive on a PT income? What I want to know is how anyone in this thread is surviving after being out of work for 7 years….without SS? I am 57 and have a long way to go yet. And, SS will not pay anything, considering how the rents are going up. I have no family to help me really. Or, they may, but they don’t want to. It is hard on them too. yikes. Can’t even land a volunteer job, to keep the gaps, from being gaps.
You really touched a nerve. What a painful time. I wish I could help. How frustrating and what a waste of talent.
I have been unemployed since August 2015. I went to a business school from January 2015 to June 2015 to update my skills in Word and Excel 2010 as well as learning QuickBooks 2013. When I tell prospective employers, they seem impressed but they hire somebody else. Even when I mentioned that I went to school for QuickBooks 2013 and did very well in the course (a”B” average), they wanted somebody who actually had experience. I feel that I went to school for nothing!
There are so many of these articles, and they all basically say the same thing – long term unemployment sucks, try to pull yourself up by your “bootstraps”, followed by more of the same self help horsesh*t. It’s as if the issue of unemployment exists in a political/social vacuum, and nobody discusses underlying causes and involvement in long term solutions. We need direct job creation NOW for people over 50 who find themselves with high skill levels and no possibility of employment. We need unions of the unemployed to form and demand serious, proactive engagement on the part of our elected officials. I’ve been trying for years here in New Mexico…and the saddest thing is the utter passive, defeatist attitude of the vast majority of the unemployed. Political engagement is fun, gets you out of your isolation and depression and makes you feel like you have some small measure of control. Try it!
Bravo, Ignatz.
I couldn’t agree more!
Fully agree. There’s two major problems besides the general economic environment.
1. Age discrimination is rampant and becoming ever more virulent. It’s sick. I see millennials openly wishing for the older generations to “just die off already.” When I started as an engineer out of college I was constantly seeking out the older engineers acting as mentors and showing people the ropes. The tech world is throwing all that way. That’s why every gadget is buggy and has interfaces that look like they were designed by blind monkeys. They throw away experience to make the same basic errors over and over again.
2. I can only speak for the US, but our society’s ability to match talent to positions that need that talent is a vast, cosmic, horrifically bad joke. The Internet seems to have accomplished nothing. Instead of sending 100 resumes to companies and not getting responses, people post resumes to 100 web sites and are not getting responses.
I really wish I had the social brain wiring required to start my own business.
I have been unemployed or underemployed for the better part of three years. Not only do I have the issue of being over 50, I am being treated for PTSD related depression, and a chronic systemic disease. I am in good physical shape, despite all of this, but I, for the most part, cannot get past the application phase. I am trying to get the money together to restart an art career that was buzzing along nicely 25 years ago but put aside to support my significant other in an advance in his career, with the promise that after 5 years it would be my turn. My turn never came around and I was left with all the bills including some hefty hospital bills as a result of him becoming a violent alcoholic instead of working on the advancement of his career. Although every thing was eventually paid off, it wrecked my credit (oddly, I never got a credit card and never bought anything on credit.)
As you can see, it makes for a difficult way in pursuing employment. What I find so surprising is the dearth of help for those of us looking to entrepreneurial independence: perhaps the best if not most logical solution for the chronically under/unemployed . Have you, in your organizing efforts found anything in that vein? I am also interested in the possibility of organizing to create at the very least an awareness of our plight and ideally the opportunities we so desperately need. Any advice or resources may be aware of would be much appreciated .
I like that idea. I tried in Oregon and I can’t get in to speak to anyone. Once, I did and they looked at me like I was just blowing air. Until we get good numbers, good stories, a strong voice, it will be hard. AARP, doesn’t even help with this. what are they there for? Keep pushing and eat some green chili stew for me at Padillia’s in Albuquerque! I miss that place.
I am 53 years old and currently employed.
Two years ago, I found myself unemployed after a temporary assignment (Temp to Hire) ended abruptly after 4 months. Due to the fact of my having had children late (my last at the age of 43), I am of the mindset of I CAN NOT BE UNEMPLOYED FOR MORE THAN 1 MONTH! I just can’t. I can not afford to be. My husband is disabled and I have the two kids (13 and 10) to consider. What I always keep in mind and ask myself is what my threshold is – what is the lowest rung/job that I am willing to take. Of course, that is my last resort and luckily I haven’t had to resort to that, but I had to be realistic and keep in mind that things might get rough.
Anyways, these are the steps I take in order to make sure that I am employable:
• Always have a computer on hand – don’t have one? Go to a pawn shop and get one or push come to shove, go to a place like Aaron’s Rentals and pay it down in installments.
• Keep up and make sure you’re up on your computer skills, especially Windows and Microsoft Office. Know your browsers (Microsoft Edge, Chrome, Firefox, etc.) Learn basic tasks and navigation. Once you’ve gotten that, go a step further. There are many free courses available online:
http://www.howtogeek.com/117674/the-best-websites-for-free-online-courses-certificates-degrees-and-educational-resources
http://www.openculture.com/business_free_courses
• Research, Research, Research:
Keep on top of interview techniques such as the STAR (Situation, Task, Action, Result) method. Practice it. Keep in mind that you’re selling a product: YOU. Learn how to market it. Turn your weaknesses into strengths.
• Utilize job boards such as Indeed & Glassdoor (www.indeed.com, http://www.glassdoor.com)
Set up multiple job agents/alerts
• If you’re in a specialized field, make sure that you keep on top of it.
• The internet is your friend – use it! There are tons of resources out there. Can’t find any close to you? Then call the head of the organization and let them know, many times they can direct you somewhere or give you specialized assistance.
• Make your job hunt your new job. When I was unemployed, I made sure that every day I did something towards and related to my job hunt: i.e. submitted applications, made contacts/networked, researched, etc
• Connect with your local unemployment office. Many times they have programs which may assist you.
• Need help with bills? This was a great resource for me when I was unemployed:
http://www.needhelppayingbills.com/index.html
• So you might have to take something that’s slightly subpar.
That’s ok – just make sure to keep looking. Don’t give up, don’t ever look down on yourself – don’t be ashamed, and remember – you’re not alone.
Good luck…
I am always shocked to find people with poor grammar and writing skills with jobs when there are so many well educated people out of work.
It’s age discrimination. All of it. Overqualified? What does that even mean? It means I can do that job with less muss and fuss than optimally qualified person you’re supposedly looking for. No, overqualified is code for “old”.
I’m a currently employed electronic engineer and very good at what I do and with a wide breadth of talent. If I lose my current job, that’s it. I’m done as an engineer. I’m over 50 and no one will touch me. It doesn’t matter than I can out-engineer any three college fresh grads combined. None of that matters.
Even the “wise” leaders of Silicon Valley have declared anyone over 30 in tech to be slow and useless. Never mind I got two patents last year at age 50.
I have no idea how to network which is always the useless go-to answer for these things. I don’t get it. I’m not wired for it. It’s like red/green colorblindness to me if you need an analogy. It’s a skill that requires a certain personality type and touted by those personality types because they don’t understand not being able to do it.
There’s a lot of deep, sick aspects to our culture, and this is one of many.
DeadSoon, First, please don’t be dead soon! Second, thank you for stopping by to read and comment. Third, I hear you loud and clear (I think many of us do, but it’s not “politic” to say these words and stand by them). Fourth, I agree with everything you’ve said. Fifth, if you’re male, were you to be dropped into the job market again, I believe you would have a slightly easier time of it. (Women still suffer from the “she looks old” [haggard, over-the-hill, done] syndrome whereas men, if well groomed, are considered “distinguished.”)
Last, please do come by to read and comment often. Sharp minds and opinions are always welcome here.
DeadSoon, Your absolutely right, I am also a Mechanical Engineer, I was let go at the age 53, I have been unemployed for the last 3 years, I have sent 1000;s of resumes, got 3 interviews in 3 years. I have lost confidence in myself. Its miserable to lose a job after 50.
I just found this site, and helpful to read and hear from others over 50!
I felt compelled to respond because the way you described networking DeadSoon, resonated for me.
It really hasn’t worked (they way it’s portrayed) and because I feel defeated and unclear at this point, I’m likely not showing up in the best light.
The job hunt becomes like dating; and I know if I’m interested when I feel it. Which means, put myself out there as best I can, when I can.
I feel like Robert some days, but by the grace of God, I hang in there….
I read this article and could totally relate to it. Although I am trying to count my blessings because 1. I have some savings and did well with a real estate investment and 2. currently have a job as a teacher, I still feel that the life I am living is full of insecurity and a lot of hard work towards a goal that doesn’t excite me.
It is disappointing to still be in career survival mode or paying my dues at work that I hate because it is the only work that is available to me now.
I am hoping to find something else to do, perhaps writing or business training that will get me back to life with adults and give me some pleasure.
Until then I put my head down and count my blessings. This isn’t where I expected to be at this stage in my life. The hardest thing is the lack of connection which I had when I was raising a family or prior to that involved in my career.
Glad I found this website.
Glad you found us, too, Stuck Here. So many of us are in a similar place — disappointed, disillusioned, disconnected. There have to be ways we can channel our skills and experience so we feel we’re creating value again, and feeling valued.
I’ve been unemployed for two and a half years. Last year I sent over 500 resumes and only had a handful of interviews. None of the companies that I interviewed with sent me a letter saying that they selected someone else. They just left me hanging. I’ve been living off my 401 K but that soon going to be gone. I hope I will make it to 62 so that I can collect Social Security and reverse mortgage my home. I am very angry, frustrated and depressed.
I am trying to get back in the job market at 60, 13 years off to raise the kids.
I volunteer as asst director of training for Experience Unlimited. It is a free program put on by the EDD of Calif. It is for professionals unemployed and underemployed to get back in the job market. Many are 50 and have worked for the same co. 15-20 yrs.
80+% of jobs are gained through networking, 31/2 % from job boards and the ATS system. Once you get to an interview hopefully with the hiring manager is 56% they like you. Today’s job search involves Marketing and Branding yourself, Networking, Networking and LinkedIn. Much more is taught to prepare. See if this program is offered anywhere near you. Mine is in Irvine, CA.
Thank you for sharing this, Lynn. Networking – yes. Critical. I checked out the EU site. Very interesting.
Is there anything we can do here to help?
EU looks great, but there is not one in Oregon. go figure. Good luck!
I used to believe, like most Americans, that hard work was the key to success. When I worked in corporate America in my thirties and forties, I maintained that mantra, working 12 and 14 hour days. I went to business school (Ivy) which cost a bundle and then got laid off. I started a company which was a victim of the great recession, and then hit fifty. Damn.
My last full time job was over two years ago. I have an exceptional academic background, experience in multiple industries and can’t get an interview for the life of me.
My wife divorced me last year.
I could no longer afford to live in my previous area, so I moved to Russia, where I have been since last year. (I’m not Russian, but worked here previously though I can’t now due to visa type). While the dollar is strong, I can afford rent.
I am at a total loss as to what to do next. I’ve been considering options. I’m lucky enough to have some small savings, but nowhere near enough to retire on – at least in the US. I miss my son.
Being here has given me some perspective, but has not diminished my depression.
But back to my original point. Hard work is not a bad thing, but it is not everything. Luck has a lot to do with it. Smarts also plays a part. Being in the right place at the right time is the best combination, and of course the corollary – wrong place wrong time – like those of us in our fifties+… well it sucks. For all the discussion of networking – it’s true, networking is critical. But at the height of the recession, everyone in my network was unemployed. And networking. That’s when I went to work overseas (Luck!)
That’s not to say giving up is a good idea. Though I’ve been spending more time looking for places I can afford to retire early with decent quality of life. Russia’s probably not the answer, though people in their fifties aren’t looked down upon like in the US.
I would love to come back to my own country and be with my son. If I get lucky enough to find work – I keep trying – I may if I can afford it.
To all of you – I hope you find your luck and your way!
It totally pisses me off when I hear entitled jerks say that the American system is better than Russia. At least you are not booted out of your job at 50. Everyone is guaranteed a job there. And most of the schmucks who accumulated a ton of crap on credit probably ended by tossing it all in the garbage when they were foreclosed upon.
Yes, we have a wonderful system here. If I were able to get out I would and I would not look back.
Everyone WAS guaranteed a job there; back then in the USSR. Almost 30 years ago. The situation is much worse in Russia than in the USA. At least you can have your food stamps and don’t die from hunger. They can kick you out any moment they like, no matter what your age is. If you are an average office clerk and are laid off in your early 40-s (or even several years before your 40 years birthday) then you are done for. No way to find another job. Besides, there is a very large social group as the “working poor”. They work full-time and 300 $ per month is all they get . Which makes 600 USD for an average family of three. I pray for you if you’ve got two children. Officially they are the middle class, I presume.
If you are over 50 and they fire you, don’t waste your time looking for a job if you’ve got no connections. And don’t get depressed as it’s not your fault. All you can rely on is 58$ per month as unemployment benefits; for one year only.
Where did you get such information, may I ask? It’s totally untrue. They can boot out a pregnant woman without thinking as very often people get their “salary” in cash.
I lived abroad for 20 years before moving back to be close to my growing family… children getting married and starting to have children. You are right, at least in Italy and the Middle East, they do not seem to look at aging the same way as in the states. The cost of living is less, actually and one can live on a small amount with dignity. The worse thing that I did was to move back, why? I love my country, was getting what I thought was older and felt that I needed to move back so I could…settle down (buy a home and stuff) that said, I spent my downpayment (dearly saved money), started getting into my very low 401k, worked at a retail store and lost that because I did not blend with the culture. Never had a problem overseas. Can’t go back abroad…because I spent all my money thinking that I would land that job soon. Reading this helped me to understand, that it is NOT ME. It is our business and social culture.
Japan expects people to stop working at 50 though. sigh. Enjoy Russia.
Hi, everyone. I’m glad I found this website to confirm that there are others who understand.
Here’s my story: I have been unemployed since July 2015. Before that, I was feeling great. I had gotten married the previous year (for the first time, at age 45), and I had a full-time job with benefits, working for a college as an online English tutor (critiquing papers, etc.).
Then, my world came crashing down. The college had budget problems and my position was eliminated. I live in the Atlanta area, and I’ve discovered that it’s “Mission: Impossible” to get another full-time job with benefits due to the competition. There must be tons of people applying for every opening, and you know there will be some who have more degrees, more experience, or more connections than you. I have applied to everything that I think would be appropriate for my English background: proofreader, copywriter, editor, etc., but I never hear anything; they always want years and years of experience. In education, you have to have a Master’s to even teach part-time on the college level these days (I have two Bachelor’s degrees from 20 and 25 years ago), and I’m not certified to teach in public schools (I wouldn’t want to be with kids today, anyway). I have had a handful of interviews for education jobs in the past 8 months, but I always get the standard rejection email.
My wife is originally from Brazil, and we are going through the Immigration process. She has her temporary green card (which was easy to obtain because I was working when she got it), but later this year we’ll be up for review for her permanent green card, and I’m scared to death that I’ll still be unemployed. Immigration looks very closely at an American “sponsor” (me). This, of course, is in addition to the other fears we all have about unemployment (food, paying bills, medical insurance, etc.).
So, here I am in my late 40s with no prospects and depression, fear, failure, and every other negative feeling overwhelming me.
Here’s hoping we can all find a “safe harbor”….
It’s still rough out there for many of us, especially in certain fields. You have my empathy.
Have you considered tutoring? (Not a “job job” exactly, but… An option perhaps.)
What about a test prep service that could put your English writing skills to use? Have you tried any of the contracting agencies in media /creative?
Don’t give up! I’ve been there but the key is to hold on! In due season, we will ALL bear the fruits of our labors.
I hold on to my daily faith.
I don’t know where you get that idea from, short of moving to Liberia or the Sudan….places so dangerous that nobody in their right mind would move there which is why our savings might actually allow us to live.
The U.S. is finished. I truly believe this. They aren’t doing anything about helping the unemployed find work. And they are doing nothing about these companies that only hire 20 year olds and layoff thousands upon thousands of workers (most of whom are over 40).
They should not even be allowed to exist without paying huge fines. Run them out of business. That would be fine with me because something could at least take their place. But when they profit by making the rest of us pay through the nose for cheap garbage that was manufactured overseas cheaply, they can also afford to quash or purchase any new companies that try to compete with them.
It will never get better.
I was in my upper 40’s and was told at the interview I was TOO old.
There are just not enough jobs out there. Full jails and suicide are the result. USA sucks.
good leave!
We are the baby boomer generation a generation that if allowed to work till retirement meaning if we were to get to collect social security ..it would bankrupt the country?,, that’s why some “think tankers” back when Bill Clinton was in office decided it was time to open our borders to aggressive, savvy hungry 3rd world youth “the new age global workforce” its these who have stolen your American retirement dream and its these who see us middle aged american citizens as the enemy! its theses that …”make no mistake” throw out your resumes!!!.. its these that make sure that even if you “old american” get work ..you don’t stay! i’m in Healthcare in a blue state ..and let me tell you they are vicious! employers seem oblivious or just want to go along with what the team wants and they want you “old American” out!!!
Many businesses are manned and run by the foreign born now “press 1 for English” how many times have you heard that? is there ageism too “yes” but, its more hatred towards the old AMERICAN workforce …..
You just gave F E a good reason for leaving. Our leaders allowed the corporations to rape the economy in the pursuit of higher profits and a ‘race to the bottom.’ Many of us would leave in a heartbeat if we knew there was a greater opportunity. I’m not against the US at all because greedy corporations are global now, but neither do I see any reason for being nationalistic. Ladies and gents over 50, I believe it’s time to put shame aside (likely the source of depression; that combined with how we judged others in a similar position in the past), and go into survival mode. Take advantage of social programs if necessary (pride goeth before the fall). We need to network, not only for work, but for moral support and friendship; loneliness and isolation is a killer. Not to blame anyone, but many of us have supported attitudes and postures in the past that led us to where we are today, and voted in heartless politicians, who have both gutted us and the economy. They are going after our Social Security next. We need to speak up now, and stop voting against our better interests. Let’s forgive ourselves and move forward.
Incredibly cruel of you
Chessgames50…
reading your post now after the election, seems even truer!
I wish we could go back in time – I’m not sure of the answers anymore, and where things are now, isn’t it!
I feel blessed to have “stumbled” upon this site, feeling as I have like I must be the only “loser” 55 year old woman who was found to be “not a good fit” for the last organization that hired me. I had two weeks left before my probationary period was up when I got slammed with the pink slip. I know in my gut that the 30-something supervisor who fired me wanted me gone the first day she was hired by the company. No amount of “sterling personality” or overtime could convince her otherwise and now here I am eleven months into being unemployed (five of those eleven months have been past the time my unemployment insurance ended).
There are entire (empty) days that feel completely surreal.
I am not now – nor do I ever want to be – used to this new role of “failed” change agent. I’ve always been completely sure of myself and my ability to make things happen just they way I want them to. I came out of my mother’s womb a highly independent female at a time when it was unacceptable to be that and now, at a time when the government wants us working until we have one foot in the grave, employers would rather see us IN THAT GRAVE. Godspeed.
God forbid.
As my meager savings account dwindles and the time draws near to renew the lease on both my car and my overpriced, closet-size apartment I find that, more often than not, I’m too sick and depressed to effectively “network.” I keep hoping to hear at least one of the presidential candidates address the plight of the “marginalized” older worker but alas, nada. Not even from Bernie Sanders (who I’ve been working to help get elected). Really? This is what I worked so hard for all my life!??? To become a helpless (!) old homeless woman who doesn’t even have a car to live in!!!??? I still have a lot of good work left in me. [“Stuck here”], tired. Too young to retire, too old to be hired. Fearing that maybe I too will be DeadSoon.
55 and underemployed for 15 plus years. Sure I have accepted it. Now injured on job there is slight chance I will return. Looking to pass on. Understand!
I’m 38 and going on 1.5yrs of being unemployed.
Some days are harder to apply than others. On days that I don’t apply are the days I just want to give up and stop humiliating myself. But then I have to kick snap myself out of it and try again.
I do get the phone calls. But it’s rare that I get an interview. It’s almost like these recruiters aren’t even reading my resume. I feel as though I’ve practically had to beg for anyone to just talk to me.
I can’t help but to take it personal. I’ve been told by multi recruiters that because of my last position held companies cant match the pay. But why not ask me if I’m ok w it instead of just turning me away? I’ll do about anything at this point. And even so, I can’t even get an entry level job or job outside of my field.
I’m completely broke and have nowhere to turn. I have no family around and no close friends that would take me in. In several days I will be homeless.
I’ve applied for assistance. But being a single childless female I am turned away. Saying they help those w families 1st or some other bs excuse. I was getting help w food and now that has been taken from me.
What’s wrong w this country? A criminal is fed 3 xs a day. Had it cooked for him/her. But me. I have to do w/o.
Not a day goes by that I don’t think of ending it. I have nothing to live for. I’m not needed or wanted. I have no purpose and I just want this feeling to stop.
I’ll end for now. Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read my comment.
What kind of work were you doing before your period of unemployment? Do you have family elsewhere that would help temporarily?
Now aged 56, my illustrious corporate career that included Fortune 100 companies is a distant memory. I could blame the GFC, that would be remiss, it perhaps was my own doing, dealing with life’s curve balls, family deaths (5 in all and two friends), my own divorce that polaxed me, and then a car accident, all between 1998 – 2007.
Having upsticked and left the USA to go back home to the UK, never occurring to me anything about ageism – I truly never saw it. I even managed to embark on a non-managerial role, first one in almost 20 years, Business Intelligence sales doing well 2008, and chance for actually making good money within 2 years since I already knew finance well. Then the GFC so the firm I was at had 32 people. I left under my own steam within the last 7 no company spends that kind of money in that type of collapse.
So at 50 in 2009 time to travel – no family, no kids… ended up down under, decided to stay, liquidated assets, spent 3 years getting PR, still motivated at this point, hell I had worked since 15, had educated myself. Immigration said they needed people like me, what a laugh. Here we are now 6 years – no FT job, odd editing and tutoring of university students, even edited a book for an academic that was published but the realism of my lack of value, and that ageism is so rampant and the lingering shadow of my divorce, now 9-10 years on, haunt my being.
No assets left, no FT work I can get, free healthcare which I had in the UK something that prompted my move home in 2007. I cannot get my head round it all how at 40 I had it all that I thought I wanted and had worked hard for over 15 years. Now 15 years on, nothing besides experience, education, and still some latent desire to add value, feel a part of something.
I have been and am depressed I know that. I knew that a decade ago, when exactly it started I don’t know… perhaps in 2001 when my father suddenly died and my mother got cancer 3 months later. But my divorce put me over the edge, God how I miss her, not that house or the stuff, just her – she gave me a purpose and I still love her so very deeply, and coping would be easier with a job I know this.
I have deleted so much off my CV/Resume, left over MBA only, show experience from 1991 to now as I don’t smoke never have, don’t drink (who can afford to), hoping for a chance. Suicide in 2008 was knocking. I’d sit on the platforms in London looking at the 120 mph fast trains thinking in February when it’s dark at 4pm one step…it would be teaming with rain, I’d be crying, thinking how stupid I had been, someone who made great business decisions, could screw up his own life so quickly in a matter of 3-4 decisions.
I even contemplated running off to the wilderness of NZ since I can living wild, probably not a good idea at 56… I have learnt to live meagerly about $1200 month I started another Masters distance learning for me..can’t afford to finish it. I know how I will live if I got a FT job and I know that I wasted so much money, I hate money and that we have to have it to survive but I need to have some to be self reliant, either a Tiny Home, converted truck or shipping container will do me – I have most of the skills to do the work, I remind myself not to be selfish, some people have it way worse than me. I have been fortunate and should be grateful, but 60 is looming and no signs of opportunities beckon.
What happened to the days headhunters would call me I wonder, a headhunter called me about a job at Lockheed Martin once. I thought I had made it, I got it since I didn’t really want it, I walked away from a Director of Finance job at a university after 9 years. I could still have been there, what a fool, maybe I would still have been married, shoulda, coulda, woulda. All because I have no work. 35 years for what? Do we place too much emphasis on work I wonder, has society indoctrinated us to believe we should. Fact is the ‘ism’s are to blame – capitalism, neoliberalism, ageism, cronyism, and nepotism. Was it always that way, I wonder.
In 2010, after only 2 short years with the fourth largest employer in the world, I was downsized after 4 rounds and a 70% cut or roughly 70,000 employees worldwide.
The three people they kept in the department, of course, were young. Nevertheless, it took me 2.75 years to find a full time job, after losing everything, savings, etc. I managed to keep my car, for it became my new home for the foreseeable future.
In the end, after finally accepting janitorial work for my church, which by the way, did NOT want to hire me, sad to say, did hire me, after many painful phone calls they received from parishioners. Believe me, I had to compete with illegals for this job.
After about three months of moping, cleaning and sweeping and other odd jobs, which paid for a roof (hotel at $200 per week) but no food, that was given and donated, I finally found a full time job with benefits. The end, so I thought, of 2.75 years of no dependents to care for me and no family, parents deceased, etc.
This job required a relocation, which the company paid, so I basically went from nothing to a $100k job overnight, but unfortunately it only lasted one year and I was 46 at the time.
Then, after that year, which ended in 2013, I got another great job for two years or until 2015 of March. Then again, let go for no reason of my own.
Now in 2016 I just turned 50, an extremely young and blessed 50.
At this point, in the last six years, I have worked a total of 3 years, and been unemployed 3 years and counting.
Currently, I am on the same path as in 2010 when laid off the first time. Right now, I am at 14 months of unemployment and my final savings have dwindled again, and I do NOT receive any other forms of benefits or welfare at all.
So under this current administration, I have lost 2 jobs, and been unemployed and living on my savings, first time depleted, this time luckily I have some money left, but it dwindles everyday, and again let go 14 months ago, with totally the same experiences as everyone describes.
So why am I writing this? Hopefully it helps someone understand, that we all have a purpose, even after we leave this earth we may never have realized how we touched others with our story in this life.
Most recently, I accepted a contract job, but it is on an as-need basis; meaning, in the last two weeks I have not worked at all!!
My motto is ‘something is better than nothing,’ and I made sure to pay my car off this time, for at worst I will have a car to live in again, and a local park to shower and shave, with cold water!!
We / you will survive, my moments during my last bout of unemployment are as memorable and cherished (I would not wish it upon anyone nor do I want to go through it again), but I actually miss the peace and no worries I obtained and the many, many people I met and networked with over this period. There are truly angels among us.
During this period, my mother passed. I had no money. I borrowed $40 for gas for a 10 hour road trip to visit my mom at her funeral. I survived on a $1.08 coke from McDonalds and two packs of cheese crackers from a friend, who fed me occasionally.
Sad to some, but true. I met so, so, so many people along the way and made so many relationships out of pure necessity, that they will last a lifetime. To this day, those friends let me know how powerful my story was to them, and how much of a witness I was to them and those around.
So, take point that your suffering, no matter what it may be is truly redemptive. I believe that purely. We were not meant to be perfect in our existence.
Keep the faith, as I will on this second time of the three O’s, for I know sooner or later something will change.
Peace to all, Thomas.
Thank you for sharing your story, Thomas. It is all too familiar in some variation to far too many of us. And what a waste of skills and lives for this country.
Thanks Thomas. What the kicker for me in your story is how you had to beg for the janitor job at your church. Really? What has happened to our churches? Yes, they say… I’ll pray for you while they watch you go from your job, to your lost apartment, to sleeping in your car. Our government will not help, they are cutting back, and will continue to do so. Flipping burgers is not enough pay for anyone to survive on. It is the people that “have” the churches, that should be helping those who “have not” and fell of bad times… it is NOT the person, it is the economy. We see it as the Person and not the economy. It is all backwards.
Thanks for sharing your story. I wish that I was not female… because I wonder how soon will it be before I have to sleep in my car? It is not safe.
I turned 50 last month and have been a career contractor in IT since the late 80’s. I have always worked but since the end of June last year I have only had one days work. I am massively in debt. I need to retrain as the work in my specialist area has died out. I might even need to do a degree in IT despite my many years worth of experience. I have been doing a lot of on-line courses that are either free or very cheap. I am wondering what on earth I will do. Employers don’t seem interested yet the government wants us to work until we fall down dead. All I can do is keep on trying to make my luck. I really want to work. I should be capable of getting myself out of this mess. They say that the only thing constant is change but where is it? I am doing my best to make changes, surely things can’t remain stagnant forever.
Guess I am another baby boomer statistic. We were all sold a line of bullshit our entire lives, thinking that like our parents, good work ethics would result in job security until retirement.
Now we find ourselves pushed out of the work force, with life times of knowledge and talent tossed in the trash. I live in Florida, where unemployment benefits are limited to 12 weeks. Try to find a new job when you are over 50 in this job market in 12 weeks!
I was let go from my job in retaliation for having my own website (on my own time, never intruded on my work) by my last employer. I was working for a nutritional supplement company that sold a lot of one particular supplement. I thought it would be a great idea to market it to pets. My boss scoffed and said it wouldn’t be worth his time. So I did all of the research, preparation, got all the licenses and everything to sell my own product. When my boss found out, he fired me (there were no “non-compete” agreements or anything). So he didn’t want to produce/market the product, but he fired me for doing it!
Right after getting fired, I found out I had cancer. Thank God it was something that could be treated (cancer of the eyelid, had to have my lower eyelid removed and re-constructed with a skin graft, and eye sewn shut for six weeks), but it kept me from being able to work, and unemployment had stopped.
The only thing keeping me going is that my pet supplement is making sales, although it is not enough to survive financially, I have decades of experience in website maintenance, copy writing, customer service and 60 wpm typing skills as well as all other office software and skills.
It is very disheartening to apply for many jobs I am qualified for and get very few interviews, and then once they figure out my age at the interview, I never hear back (I’m youthful looking and have a professional appearance, so I don’t think appearance is the issue).
I’m just very depressed, feeling that the world changed the rules on us, we have no value once we get over 50 in the work force. There is no assistance for people in our position. We fall off all of the unemployment ranks because once your unemployment runs out they don’t even count you as unemployed! If you can’t scratch a living out of something you come up with yourself, you are SOL!
Hello DA and All the Ladies, Well in a month I will be 60 and I am so glad to say “Good bye” to my 50s which really sucked. All I can say to the woes posted is “ditto” – my manpanion died, I had to short sale my house (my future), had to send my son to live w/the father, bankruptcy. Tried to switch careers thinking this is a no brainer from Massage Therapist / Yoga Teacher to something less physically demanding and more stable to get back on my financial feet. Well it was quite a climb up the mountain. Lots of setbacks, lots of icky jobs and odd jobs.
Here I am just about to enter the 60’s and suddenly it’s as if the stars re-aligned for me. During all this time I kept up with my technology skills and entrepreneurial curiosity thanks to the local library etc..
I landed a job as a Location Independent Boat Broker. I can go anywhere w/ phone and laptop!
Also working in the boat community I meet all types of people related to my work. A whole new world.
I guess if I had to blame my 50s for being the worst it actually led me to this great new opportunity. I never saw it coming. It landed in my lap because I KEPT LOOKING!
LOOK FOR WHAT IS DIFFERENT AROUND YOU…I KNOW IT DOESNT’ MAKE SENSE WHAT I MEAN BY THAT BUT JUST LOOK!
I investigated moving south, southwest, back west to CA and ended up back in NJ.
I worked so many jobs, just ask me if you need some info about pretty much anything from kitchen designer to trade show lead generator, wedding planner assistant, jewelry sales, working for an HVAC sales lead generator standing in a local Home Depot…it all sucked! Really bad!
But I could not give up. I was (and sorta still am) broke. I had to move in with my elderly mother! Sucks! But I have to do this and I have to push hard to sell boats.
I KNOW I’M JUST RAMBLING… NOW AT ALMOST 60 I ASSURE YOU IF YOU KEEP GOING AND LOOK FOR SOMETHING DIFFERENT IT WILL SHOW UP.
The only thing that helped me hang on was I could not end my life and leave 3 young adult children behind wondering why I gave up. Seriously I was at that point. So low. DON’T GIVE UP!
When I was a junior in college back in the late 1990s I remember applying for part-time work in Boston. I’d get no bites, regardless the venue I used. The excuse was the “bad economy.” I graduated (Ivy League biochemistry degree–so much for the value of STEM degrees) with a ton of debt but the only thing I could get to put food on my table (both parents dead since my freshman year, no living relatives, totally on my own) was teaching at a local adult education community center. I kept that job for 5 years, advancing up the chain, doing my best to remain valuable to the community, despite the “honorarium” pay which barely allowed me to survive, let alone pay off my student loans.
Five years later, I left to return to school. I needed to make some cash if I was going to escape the horror stories I heard nearly every day about how retirement was a death sentence for more and more Americans. Another Ivy League degree under my belt, and the only job I could get was working in the office of one of my professors for minimum wage, essentially as a secretary. Over the next ten years I spent more money on diplomas and certificates and professional training–whatever the so-called experts online and in the community decided was necessary to secure living-wage work. Today I have about $800 in savings. That’s it. Still paying off my student loans. Living on credit cards JUST to eat.
Recently I enrolled in an English language certificate program, $3K (credit card), to teach English abroad. I want to stay in the USA, but–and I can prove it because I’ve kept meticulous records–after more than 10,000 job applications, I have no other option. I get maybe one interview for every 100 applications I send out. They take one look at me and after they recover from the shock that I’m not the person they expected—especially now I’m in my 40s—they just go through the motion interviewing, devoid of the excitement they’d exhibited when they called (but hadn’t seen) me. Sometimes I get called back for a second and third interview, but nothing pans out. Yes, I’ve paid thousands to “experts” to help me tailor my CV and cover letters, to take professional head shots, to polish my LinkedIn premium profile, to “network” appropriately using all the right online and community resources, and even to shop with me to build the “right wardrobe.” The result? I’m many thousands poorer with no job.
It’s been over a year since I worked part-time. I hit rock bottom last night when I got not one but SEVEN rejections from schools in DEVELOPING NATIONS that have been flooded with Western teachers fleeing the USA, Canada, the UK, Australia… to escape crushing student loans and unremitting under- and unemployment. The teaching market abroad, historically eager for recent college grads despite their lack of qualifications and experience, is drying up–especially for people who look like me. There are no anti-discrimination laws in other countries that prohibit patent profiling.
Anyway, today is my best friend’s birthday. I was extravagant in treating him because I know this is the last birthday I’ll make. I have no money, no family, and other than my sole best friend whom I see maybe once every two or three years briefly in a distant state, no (other) friends. And the countless online articles that catalog reasons for the persistent unemployment don’t ever offer meaningful, productive advice for how to survive, how TO GET a job. I’m done.
I can’t keep living every day struggling to find work only to be repaid with more rejections for reasons I have no control over. I’m sorry I’m not a hip, good-looking 21-year-old. I’m sorry my parents didn’t survive to see my through college, or that they didn’t have the wherewithal to invest for our family–not that I really care about that; I just miss them. I’m sorry MOST of all that I was born the wrong kind of human being to be worthy of surviving. I’m told every day that no one owes me a job. Articles’ comment sections are surfeited with bitter, angry, hateful recriminations about how entitled and irresponsible I am, about how this is my fault. I haven’t the energy to respond anymore. Learning that even the developing world doesn’t need you, doesn’t want you, how can you be surprised that your own country cannot wait for you to die and get off the planet?
This isn’t going to change. I’m not a historian, but I’m well enough traveled and a sufficiently reasonable observer of human nature across different cultures to understand that we humans are fundamentally hierarchical. In so many cultures there are the elites who hoard resources, and varying strata beneath them leading to the plebes whom no one really cares about. People like me are expendable. Our only value to our governments and our communities–especially when these lattermost don’t include family members attached to us by strong bonds of affection and other emotional determinants–is as means of tax revenue and physical labor. I’m actually not that bitter because I realize that the basic problem I’ve suffered from my whole life, the reason I’ve failed to acquire work despite diligence, trustworthiness, perseverance, and at least average intelligence, is that I’m just the wrong type of human being.
Thank whatever-good-you-believe-in that the Internet now offers access to peaceful, painless, relatively affordable self-euthanasia. If our culture and government really gave a damn about decreasing suicide rates, they wouldn’t sanction policies that make it on the one had so expensive JUST to live (not even flourish) and on the other hand so very, very hard JUST to acquire work. The truth is policy is about politics and lobbyists. And the poor, older, and unemployed just don’t matter other than fueling the vacuous pathos of politicians’ voting rhetoric. Yes, I’m looking forward to dying just not to have to be part of this anymore.
Sorry for the very long comment. I just needed to get it off my chest. Good luck to the rest of you.
I wish you would drop a line here, just to “chat.” startingover50plus @ gmail.com.
I feel your pain and what you are going through. I was in your shoes in 2014 irregardless what the causes were. It is like having a living body but living in a dead world. Even well-meaning words from family or friends eg You will be fine. You will surely find a job, there are many jobs out there. Just don’t be choosy. Be hopeful. Pray for you etc.
The reason why I stopped feeling suicidal and stopped thinking of dying was when I found meaning in these words… What if tomorrow is a better day? which I accidentally stumbled upon when googling for ways to die….
God has determined. We reap what we sow. It’s all a matter of trying to survive and cope one step at a time. It’s a matter of time if we keep on trying. God will never forsake those who are suffering from other people’s selfishness and sins.
I’m 51 years old and can identify with most of the commenters here. Like many, I feel like I’ve done almost everything “right” and don’t know how I ended up where I am now, except maybe that I had enough hubris to believe I deserve to live a respectable life like everyone else around me. In 2007 I participated in my then-employer’s development process which led me to start pursuing a bachelor’s degree in computer science, which would allow me to work up to my potential more than the admin job I was in. I was doing well but in the last few years was feeling more and more worn out as I ramped up from 1 to 2 classes per semester, which was still a lot even switching to part-time while school was in session.
For my final semester in Fall 2014 I decided to take an education leave of absence from my job…my employer warned me they don’t guarantee employment at the end of a leave, but I naively believed they’d either hire me back on or I’d easily find other employment given my degree. Wrong on both points.
In October 2014 my employer announced a huge round of layoffs. Their reason for not hiring me into their IT department came down to my not having completed an internship as part of my degree program — I’m not sure how I was to do this since I was still working for them. I think the real reason is they viewed me as a “free” layoff since they didn’t have to pay me severance.
Meanwhile, I was realizing my low energy wasn’t just burnout but something medical, and I was diagnosed as having obstructive sleep apnea. But still I had a positive attitude and believed my life would turn around despite this self-serving company I worked for. I even made a move from Minneapolis to Atlanta, and I am glad I did despite everything else. But now it’s a year later and I’m still unemployed except as an Uber driver, which I can’t really stand doing long enough to make serious money although it’s becoming clear it’s my only option. I’ve had a number of interviews for jobs, all of them admin assistant roles which I mostly don’t want and pay much less than I was getting when I left the former job.
I continue to struggle with energy issues and am not tolerating the CPAP used to treat the apnea well enough. On that front I’m trying to get into a clinical study for a new treatment that would be much less cumbersome. I’ve gotten rejections on all the interviews I’ve been on and am thinking I’ve been experiencing age discrimination both on these and from my former employer but have no hard evidence. I do have some hope in the form of an online web development course I’m using to augment my web design skills and am trying to find small web development jobs to get experience — these obviously cannot be a single income source. In the meantime I’m burning through my 401(k). With my student loan debt, my net worth is probably now negative.
I probably have 3-4 months before I’d completely run out of my current savings, so I’m not in immediate trouble…but that time will go quickly. I continue to look for admin jobs hoping something will pan out so I at least can restore financial solvency, but every time I think I’m getting somewhere, I hit a dead-end — go on an interview only to never hear back despite writing thank-you notes (some handwritten(!)), talk to an energetic recruiter at a temp agency about a potential job which I then never hear about afterward, etc.
The whole thing feels like a cruel joke. And like some others here, I’ve had thoughts about taking my own life. I’m still using this in my head as my last resort if things don’t work out…but I don’t feel like I can talk about it with people I know…
Thanks for taking the time to read my story.
Brian, If I understand correctly, you completed your degree. Is that right? Is there any sort of alumni network you can tap into? Where are you in terms of “working” any contacts you might have? Are there resources through the school you attended? Any personal contacts there that could help?
The reality is, most of us get jobs through referrals and connections, and often there are jobs that are never advertised. Certainly, the older we get, the tougher it is, but 51 is still pretty young, as “middle aged” goes.
As for your 3-4 months remaining, is there anything you can do to stretch that in some way? (I know I’m asking obvious questions, but…) For example, beyond being an Uber driver and small web gigs, is your living situation such that you might be able to get a roommate for awhile? Rent a room to a student?
The sleep deprivation and health issues make everything so much tougher, I know. If you can find an improvement in that area, it will certainly help. And yeah. The age discrimination is real, but tough to prove. As too many of us can agree.
Hey All… Any other ideas for Brian???
To everyone who had the courage to publish their experiences, I applaud you all!!! I was extremely moved.
I’m 54 years old and was laid off in January due to “restructuring”, a.k.a. the company hiring a new VP who replaced both my manager and me with one of her former employees. I had worked there 10 years, had positive performance reviews, and stupidly thought I would finish my career there. To add insult to injury, I was “let go” on a Friday morning but, at least, was given ONE cardboard box into which to pack my belongings. I left without fuss or fury, head held high – despite having a door shut behind me as I offered to shake the VP’s hand as I felt it was the professional thing to do.
I began my job search in earnest the following Monday – no time off, as I realized it was going to take a long time to find comparable employment. To date, I’ve lost track of how many resumes I’ve emailed, sent out, etc. I spend several hours daily just looking for work, and it is an uphill battle. You re-do and re-format your resume, you customize your cover letter to match the job to which you’re applying, you immediately send a thank you note after you have been interviewed – and, what happens? Nothing.
I’ve been fortunate to have had some interviews but, like many of you, the recruiter’s initial excitement disappears when I meet with said recruiter for a face-to-face interview (and, yes, being a woman, I colour my hair, wear appropriate clothing, yada-yada-yada). Ageism is alive and well! It’s especially discouraging when the company reposts the job right AFTER you had the two-hour interview!
Again, like many of you, I worked my ass off to have the successful career, including going to school part-time, working hellish hours, and being a loyal, dedicated employee to a fault who never said no, no matter how heavy or hard the workload. I’m now questioning whether it was really worth it…
So much for a solid work ethic!
I find the worst part of being unemployed is the emotional upheaval. I’m normally a very happy, upbeat individual, but that is not how I’m feeling now. I am angry, bitter, disillusioned, as well as fearful of my future. I am tired of hearing “you’ll find something soon” or “don’t give up”, even though friends and family mean well. I have no tolerance for anyone in my circle who complains about his/her job when all I want is to work. I take offense when someone says jokingly (about themselves) “I’ll probably get fired” or “you must be really enjoying having the summer off”. Yup, beautiful summer days are a real treat when you feel lonely, isolated, struggling to look for the positive, and eyeballing that 40 of vodka in the freezer…
After I read this article (and your replies), I feel comforted that I’m not alone – and for that, I thank you all. Your words have helped me more than you can realize and have motivated me to keep going – just putting my two cents worth here has made me feel a little better. Saccharine as it sounds, I hope from the bottom of my heart all of you find resolution and that your respective circumstances improve.
We all have value and should not be made to feel otherwise.
My last pay check was just over 3 years ago. Before that, I was working at a not for profit and got paid when there was money. I worked in an office and managed the small international organization that used no excel, outlook or access. I have a wonderful supportive husband, but has no education in the states and works very hard; up at 3am and home to bed by 8:30pm, for really no money. We have two wonderful kids (9 girl and 11 boy). Both achieved Principals Honor Roll after losing both grandparents within 5 months of each other, two other family relations and a pet. They are amazing! They want their own rooms, a dog, a back yard. We have been living with my brother for 2 years and that ended badly. We were blessed when this couple we have known for 20 years offered their two extra bedrooms. We have been there for 5 months.
I have been looking for regular work for a few years, now. I went back to school and got my Masters of Science in Business Management and graduated with honors with a 4.0…Great! Not so. I still don’t have skills that are needed today. Online YouTube videos show me, but without practice, I still don’t know what to do. I had an interview two days ago. The application process is now into a month. One phone screen that was supposed to be 15 min. lasted 45. The phone interview was supposed to last 1 hour lasted for 2 (the call dropped a lot). Still not bad. The guy went out of the country for a week. One face to face with the CEO at a Panera for 45 min. Just two days ago, I had another face to face interview with the other man I will be working with. He gave me a skills test…on paper as well as on the computer. It was a small HOT room with one table two chairs and a desk with a computer on it. As I took each test, he sat right there watching me. The pressure was unbelievable! The security of this building was very high. When I left, after bombing each of those tests, it was storming…rain, puddles, lightning…I was invited to wait out the storm outside under their small awning. I said that it was ok…Its Florida! I ran to my car saying over and over and over and over again…”How HORRID!” I knew I bombed the only opportunity that I have had in years!
My daughter was sweet. I laid down and when she came into the room and saw me sleeping, she turned off the light and closed the door. When I woke up, she held me and told me that it was all going to be ok. My son, his 11th birthday, and I could not get him anything that he wanted. He is so understanding. He got two shirts and a $10 gift card to Walmart for a Star wars Lego set….the one he wanted was 12.97. I didn’t have the money. He wanted to put it on lay a way. Walmart only accepts layaway at $50. He is saving the extra $5 for what he wants plus the tax. He looked so grateful when he received the gifts and I could tell he was blessed. My family is wonderful. When I look around when, like today, everything looks so daunting….I try to remember and see the blessings that G-d gave to me!
I just received a phone call from someone that I used as a reference. The guy that I interviewed with and gave me the skill test and that I ran from, just called and asked extensive questions about me. I am now writing this a little more inflated then when I began.
I understand what was said in the article. I understand what Cindy and others are going through. I am 50, well educated and no computer skills and no industry. I have no savings, no retirement and no credit….well, bad credit, now. I am 30 days from my losing my car, I am two days away from losing car insurance, my health insurance that I was forced to buy is suspended due to no payments. I know I am no ray of sunshine. I know it really doesn’t help that I am in the same boat. The assumptions, the empty or heart felt sympathies, the well wishers, etc. don’t really mean anything after a while. The loneliness, the depression, the smiles for the family you are forced to show you are ok, then you run to the bathroom to cry while making dinner; it is more difficult than anyone can fathom unless you are walking through it. I am very sorry that I have no answers for you. I can only say keep looking around. Even though you need to take the day step by step and breath by breath sometimes, keep breathing, keep stepping, keep looking at your motivation. Take a deep breath and take another step. Keep moving…
You are not alone! It has been almost 10 years when a bare-headed demon from the east destroyed my career. It was not without warning, as I lamented in a note to his boss and HR puppet: “why will anyone intentionally want to destroy other people?”. It was a warning for me, but, though the Creator of heaven of heavens pre-warned me, He did not give me the skills to escape the bitter cross that would follow. I fought back, but lost! I lost a job with total yearly compensation well above a quarter of a million dollars, excluding the stocks and perks. I was almost 60 at the time. The timing was very bad. It was during the financial collapse that ushered in a terrible recession. Since then, I have known and tasted the sorrow of loneliness, humiliation, rejection by family members, associates, and friends. Not even the church was there for me, except the one who promised: “I will never leave you nor forsake you”. “I will be with you always..”.
Even though well skilled in data technology, thoroughly educated, sharpened with innovations and creativity, yet rejection is all I get from coast to coast, company to company, effort to effort! I searched for jobs diligently, tried starting my own businesses, tried stock market (where I lost EVERYTHING), but nothing seems to work out.
Talking of loneliness, the incurred financial stress has brought a damaging loneliness and stress to our marriage. She works to pay the mortgage and bills and thereby absolutely consumed in her career. Nothing else matters! No intimacy, no outings, little or no communication, hence loneliness seems to be each other’s best companion.
While hanging to the faith of our fathers, hoping against hope that some day, our Creator will shed a little milk of compassion on me, I sincerely and eagerly seek to escape to the fragrance of jungle. There I hope for some soothing healing listening to birds and insects singing sweet melodies. Meanwhile, I subdue stress by walking miles in the woods – the cypress, cedar, and pine of the pacific northwest! The woods and their co-inhabitants provide me hope, joy, and relief such that humans refuse to offer. As I look through their leaves and branches, I see light into the sky of skies, such that reminds me of the supreme and absolute power of my Creator. After all, He made all things for Himself.
Thanks for sharing. It is new day. Never give up.
That’s the other aspect of losing a great paying career is the toll it takes on our marriages. Our age group of men – like our fathers – expected to be the bread winner or at the least an equal contributor. I’m not sure how you feel but I feel guilty all the time! I hate having to see my wife off to another 10-12 hour grueling work day she has to put in. She says she doesn’t resent me but I can tell she isn’t exactly happy either. It seems we have lost something and I can’t put my finger on it. We don’t seem to laugh as much as we used to or be as close. I can’t help but think she would be better of without me and would have a happier life with an successful man… I know her best friend of 45 years and very successful herself has scorn for men who are unemployed or make little money… I can’t help thinking she is rubbing off on my wife or maybe I am getting paranoid.
I never want to give up, I just want to make a decent income and love what I do. I just didn’t realize how hard that can be do to in today’s society.
Another rejection – phone int for a couple of positions
Must have smelled the old on me
Rejected
I’m glad I found this website and read everyone who shared’s stories. I’m 51 and am applying online to jobs to no avail. I’m getting unstable jobs like waiting tables, retail, or temp work, but my feet and legs can’t take much of that kind of work. You guys aren’t alone. I recently lost everything, my apartment, my job and my mother All in the month of August. I’m staying in a room until I get a job. I am getting unemployment for 16 weeks. I’m able to pay my car payment and car ins, and phone bill. Nothing else. I do have an understanding friend that is letting me use his spare room. I’m hoping I get another job soon. I have 9 more weeks of unemployment left. I’m grateful for what I do have but it’s really embarrassing to get screamed at because NASCAR is blaring on the TV. Keep applying is what I am doing.. Use every moment you have and don’t burn yourself out.. Take time out to get fresh air, and away from the job search.
I’m practically in the same boat as you, except broker and a little older – I was a sahm for 13+ years and now my only child lives at their dad’s because I haven’t got a place, just a room at a friend’s house… and no unemployment check… I’ve got physical disabilities so have applied for SSD, and waiting to see if I will get it…
but I definitely feel your pain… you’re not alone, hang in there!! yes, we have to keep trying, and breathe!
Try being 61, unemployed and living in a rental property in Sydney, Australia. where the longest lease is 12 months.
good article, and sadly the future for many
as some have alluded to/experienced, the crap really hits the fan when you add in health issues
in my case two back surgeries for two degenerated, badly herniated discs crushing nerves (24k debt).. now they want to fuse/adr (a paltry 120k surgery for them)..
cant sit for long, cant lift anything heavy, cant do much of anything for too long
haven’t had a normal job in 8 years
i eke by on my own part time small business, thats even becoming too painful to do too much with and there’s barely enough work anyway with it to pay the bills
having said that, *I’m sure there’s people in even worse circumstances*, which is probably the only thought that keeps me going – hang around to be a pain in the ass for the system
the government here wants to increase the retirement age to 75. what a bunch of idiots.
a good movie i watched a while back was “company men” there’s a character in that called phil woodward.. i wonder how many are set on a path just like him once they hit the scrapheap..
It’s very annoying hearing the networking advice for desperate people. People are repelled by unemployed old people. I have been unemployed for 53 weeks….again, and at the age of 60, while talking with a retired man who is somewhat deaf, he assumed I was asking him for work when he couldn’t make out what I was saying. I could see the revulsion in his face. When I was unemployed in the past, people on LinkedIn would not accept my connection request. But when I scored a good job, suddenly they connected!
I recall a time in my 20s when I became underemployed as a lab technician, the boss was interviewing for a new employee. I asked why he rejected a nice old man who applied. I was told he was not a good fit, which apparently meant he was not a young female. Why the hell do employees have to look the same?
With all due respect to those who had encouraged Robert to not consider suicide, it is a bit presumptuous to say that he would be missed. He’s the best judge of that. Also, anyone wanting him to stay for their sake is being pretty selfish. “Robert I need you to be miserable so my life won’t be negatively impacted.” Would they be willing to sacrifice whatever resources they have to turn Roberts’ life around? Put bluntly, put up or shut up.
Totally agree with you on this Thurston.
Interesting that family say how much they love us. How much they care. How much their lives will be impacted negatively if we die , but yet not willing to sacrifice much or if anything to help a person feeling despair.
I agree. Family and church. How much they care, but not willing to sacrifice anything to help a person in despair. I am visiting my sisters (sold 401k) so I can visit my 99 year old mother, that I have not seen for three years. (the longest I have gone without seeing my mom in my lifetime at 57). She is doing fine, has a nice home, works hard and holding on. She knows my situation, out of unemployment, over 700 jobs applied for, no takers, money running out (I use my 401k now), no job…nada. Is she offering that I stay with her, and can try to find something in a different state and to be closer to mom? No. She just says, what are you going to do? Keep drawing from your 401k? You have got to find something. Yeah. At least, free rent, until I can figure it out, would relieve a great amount of stress. But… by reading this… I wonder if inside she knows that I won’t find anything, no matter the experience, no matter the brains. Horrible feeling that I am having about all this. I leave in a few days and pray that I can see my mum again.
Thanks Sunny. We are all seeking the dignity and financial security that comes with solid employment. What lengths should a person be willing to go to obtain financial stability? Bilking the vulnerable? Robbing banks? Embezzling from one’s church?
Many of us have cashed in our 401ks. At what point do we cash in our morality or humanity to save ourselves? I’ve yet to get a real answer to this question.
I was recently laid off from a sales job in a technology company (second lay off in 3 years) in the San Diego region. At 55 it’s becoming more difficult to land jobs then be productive as a sales rep since so many businesses are not making any purchases. In sales if you don’t hit your quotas your gone!! Very difficult market and hoping I can land a job with a company that has a solid product and some demand associated with it.
Here’s something I don’t understand, at least not fully: Why are we not more angry, and less depressed? Why do long term unemployed workers in this country turn anger and frustration inward, instead of putting it into a political context and DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT? Some years ago I tried to start a Union of the Unemployed in my state, which is one of the poorest in the nation, to organize people into a body politic significant enough for our elected officials (mostly Democrats on the federal level) to give a shit about? They don’t care about you. They want you to remain silent and die. They don’t care what you do as long as you don’t make trouble.
What I found is that we are our own worst enemies. Passive and apathetic, and thinking that the only way out is to just keep on keeping on and something will break. Well, as George Carlin said, it’s called the American Dream because you have to be asleep to believe it.
I am over 55. I have decades of customer experience in I.T., and I once pulled in six figures annually.
Today, I can’t get so much as a “Go to hell” from any of the hundreds of employers I’ve applied to.
They don’t even have the decency to answer. To them, i am not even worthy of a reply.
I am on food stamps now — something I never dreamed I would resort to. I am so ashamed. I have failed.
At this point, I am just waiting for death. I would never do anything stupid, but I hope death comes soon, on its own.
I have no hope.
Hello Everyone, D.A.-Thank you for publishing this post. Since here is without judgement, I am 55 and had no choice but to go on SSDI last year after working since age 11. Horrible divorce 12 yrs married., raised my 3 great, now grown kids, often working 2 & 3 jobs hard labor to earn higher wages (deadbeat dad). No assets. Stopped my teaching degree for the sake of supporting ex to accomplish his dream,….and he did-go figure, and have never owned anything. Thankfully I was gifted a car and am ever so grateful for that. I am in a rental which the owner has been placed into perm nursing home for dementia and this house is in the 3rd phase of foreclosure and I literally face homelessness with in 90 days. I have always been a go-getter always turning every stone, exhausting every avenue. Finding housing IS my full time job and it’s real bad out there.
I have never had a problem finding work until these past 4 years-nothing. I continue to search in hopes of a miracle. It’s so sad to hear of so many of you guys/gals, myself included, thinking of ending our lives. Depression, hopelessness, and our lowered self-esteem is so backwards to what we should be experiencing having worked hard, loyally, and honestly all of our lives.I see no way out at this moment of this evening but I desperately want to. So please, all of you, (I read just about every post), your experiences, frustrations, despairs, ideas and hope have given me a different perspective. I hope for everyone that what each of you need and strive for comes your way or you find a way back to wholeness. Thank you again Ms. Wolf and Writers.
J-I am with you. Don’t give up…I had to give up my food stamps last year because $900.00/month is too much to qualify me. Up until last year public transportation (bus), was my ride and the closest bus stop is 1.1 miles UPHILL. I know that sounds like one of those old stories but it’s the truth. In this past month, being a huge NCIS fan, I adopted a line that “Gibbs” quoted from his mother and I have actually practiced doing this:
“When I feel like I’m in a dark place, I close my eyes and remember the good things” It doesn’t change the current situations we all are facing but it does help me to smile and escape for a few minutes. You reminded me tonight to keep on practicing that. Our lives are worth a lot even if we have next to nothing.
Over 50 and long term unemployed…WE DESERVE our condition. That’s right…we are weak. Why is it, that EVERY group sensing the slightest pressure, disadvantage or discrimination, has the collective initiative to make their presence felt in our nation’s capital, Washington, D.C. That is; EVERY group with the exception of the UNEMPLOYED. Long overdue… let us follow the model of the woman’s march… reach-out… join forces and show the world just how America has squandered her most precious resource… the human kind. Strength and results in numbers.
I have to say that my Fifties have totally sucked so far. I had work during the first half, but now approaching nearly 58 (hard to believe) the work has been harder to find, more discrimination, less opportunities, and a desire to do something different but what? Overall the 50’s have been terrible: physically, mentally, spiritually. It has been a real shock to me (as the forties were really good) and I honestly don’t know where to go from here. The thought of another 30 years of this is frightening. I found myself becoming more isolated, less social, empty nester with sons out of state, no real home anymore, and less desires overall. I’m bummed about it and I am an attractive, vital woman still. Sigh.
We’re not supposed to say it (or we risk being accused of a bad attitude)… But I agree with you. My impression is that more of us have had a similar experience, but are hesitant to admit it.
My experience is similar to that of so many here, and every day is a struggle. Stay-at-home dad with plenty of education. Got divorced and needed job. Except age + the inability of the work world to understand non-traditional / non-linear work backgrounds (like stay-at-home parent) = 9+ years of struggle. You’d think that our wisdom, refined judgment, well-developed skills, etc. would be valued. But they aren’t.
And for anyone with the slightest bit of humanity, ours is a shockingly inhumane society that cares little for those in need (as our society has been “captured” by corporate America and everything is viewed in light of its impact on the bottom line of those corporations [who pay to elect politicians who’ll do as they are told rather than focusing on the common good]).
I mean, the new administration in Washington has proposed eliminating/cutting health care coverage, heating assistance, Medicaid, and on and on while it boosts military spending. That is, literally, sick. There is no moral compass there. The fundamental problem here, and with humanity in general, is that the average person is too selfish. The CEOs, the politicians, and so many of our neighbors simply don’t care enough about their fellow human beings. And we all suffer as a result. So many lack empathy chiefly because they have not experienced any major misfortune themselves.
Many people here have expressed interest in organizing. I’m an easygoing sort, and I’ve reached out to a few people that have posted comments on sites like this. My experience is that people often find it strange when you actually reach out. You’d think they’d like the human connection, but when you reach out they back away. I would think that many here would appreciate a fellow human being who understands the horror of all this and the melancholy and despair that results from a lack of job, money, and purpose.
We can all do stupid things for which we are to blame. But misfortune (bad luck) is also real, though today’s society is quick to blame the individual and doesn’t allow for bad luck. Yet those ancient Greek writers of tragedy certainly understood that bad luck could befall anyone. I’d like a bit of misfortune to visit all those uncaring politicians and CEOs. For only then would they begin to empathize and, if we’re lucky, behave in a more humane way.
I would suggest considering K-12 teaching and nonprofit work if you haven’t already. (I’m in a teaching program now.) Even government jobs (which have a ridiculously bureaucratic application process) are an option. TSA screener is far from my dream, and I would feel like the world had completely failed to appreciate my skills if I took on that job, but it will pay a few bills and they DO hire older folks.
Good luck to all here. May all of you (and I) soon be dealt a good hand . . .
Will provide email to anyone who wants to get in touch.
I was a school teacher with a fantastic employment history, obtaining excellent results for my students. However, due to the pressure of the job, a divorce (that I did not want) and the death of my father I had a complete mental breakdown, which destroyed my career instantly. Last year, I managed to find work in a school teaching a little in the morning and supporting other teachers during the day – all for the £7.50 per hour (British minimum wage). Two weeks ago I was told this contract had too ended. I have to keep working as I have a home and three children to support but cannot find well paid work anywhere. Like some of your other comments – I have literally written for hundreds of jobs in the past two years – taken applications in by hand and tried every trick I know to just get an interview.
I currently have a 4 week contract doing heavy manual labour (I am not 21 anymore) and then that’s it – I don’t know where to turn. My family have lent me thousands of pounds just to stop the house being repossessed but they cannot give me more and I feel terrible about accepting it in the first place – this money also needs to be repaid soon. It is all hopeless – my past achievements count for nothing and I am left feeling that I have wasted my entire life completely. I now have no money left and am trying to sell the house just to feed the family. I am left with a bottomless feeling of hopelessness which is quickly developing into feelings of acute depression, anxiety with daily suicidal thoughts – I have actually made a suicide plan and begun writing letters to loved ones in advance. We all need some purpose in life – I am bright, educated and experienced and yet there is seemingly no place for me in this world we live in. I am really not sure what to do next.
Jon, One of the reasons this entire discussion persists after a number of years now is precisely because there is a shameful number of us — people who have been pushed aside or simply allowed to slip through the cracks, people who most of society assumes “can take care of themselves” or if hardship has befallen us, since we’re educated, it must have been something we did.
And that just isn’t so.
Where to go and what to do next? I’m not sure. I’m happy to do anything I can to help you connect in some way with others who can, if nothing else, remind you of your worth. But that’s really not what you need. You need MONEY. You need paying work. You need to be able to take care of your kids and feel like life isn’t meaningless. I get it. Everyone who has commented here gets it, or their own variation of it.
I do know this, what you CANNOT do, and I will insist on it. You cannot take your own life. What that will do to your children — the legacy that would leave them with — warrants you hanging on, continuing to reach out everywhere and anywhere (including spots like this) to keep going. I’ve seen what happens to children of suicide – kids, teenagers, adults. They are profoundly, irrevocably damaged. You don’t want to do that to the people who love you.
Let’s see what else we can figure out.
OK…here is my story. This ole battle axe is 54. Single, never married and no kids. Never married and no kids because I grew up in a horribly dysfunctional home and learned children were bad, no good, etc…so never wanted them…or found a partner…now an old maid! HA! But, my story is I have been self employed as an artist since the age of 26. And yes, my work is good…not a dreamer with no talent hoping to have talent. I worked in advertising and the entertainment industry with companies like Disney, etc. I now specialize in murals and portraits/canvas commissions as technology passed me by while working in the 90s computers came out and overnight literally took at least 70% of the traditional art jobs away. With the economy of the last ten years my business that was only earning me a modest living dropped drastically. I have depleted any savings…and there is no family inheritance coming my way.
I have looked in my most desperate times for a regular day job to no avail. No one will hire an over 50 person who hasn’t had a job in over 35 years! I have been working as a professional artist since the age of 18 and became self employed doing freelance art at the age of 26. Never made a great deal of money so social security will be nil. So, in a nutshell here I am now at 54 with no retirement savings, living month to month, no family alive, plus I am now an old maid…no one is looking for a woman over 50 trust me.
So…what will my future look like. I think the one real only solution has for its unpopularity obviously not been talked about. The only option is live out a horrible existence in your golden years in poverty and on the streets…or commit suicide. OK…there I said it. This is really the only answer. Come on people do you really think things will turn around and gainful employment will be found again…no. It is a new world and our time has passed those of us over 50. We must face it.
Right now I am healthy and I am not even that ugly /old looking…but its coming and I don’t want to see how it ends!
Hi Beverly, do you have an update? I hope things are better for you now – I get the feeling you have a lot to offer. Peace.
Just read Jon’s post. Yep…this is what all this adds up to for us…suicide. Its true…its easy to say don’t do it…give a reason not too. I get it Jon has kids…they would be OK either way…not that I am advocating he do anything…just saying I totally live in that world. For me…no kids, no partner, Too old to date! HA!… and no living family I just feel like falling off the face of the earth. When there is no “Hope left” there is no hope. Hope is all you have when you have nothing….so no hope…equals?
what if apart from feeling so depressed and jobless for years that you have to the point of suicide, what if apart from those issues you had also really gotten out of money like 0 or in debt and don’t even have food or shelter or anything other than clothes! even in such case i have seen people survive with no stress…..i’m talking real for those who are really depressed! i have seen people take it all easy, get some small free money or food time to time from somewhere without feeling (to get help thru money is your right and it does not make you belittle, as its the duty of humanity to help humanity and its criminally unethical and inhuman not to help others at danger and enjoy one’s life, point is asking random ppl for temporary help is just 100% ok infact its ur right to live….specially these days there are tonns of options. you just have to step out of that self respect realm that is taking you to suicide, i know how bad, lowly and pathetic it feels like to think about these options, but what about those who do it to live and get along until their life works again? aren’t they also humans and same as you? Look at poor nations like india and africa and alike….you see how lowly they live, but they are happy, you are much more better than them in you situation. i can give example even of struggling pregnant women who didnt have food or medicine etc but somehow they survived, didn’t give up, coz around them in their society was the trend of coping with extreme difficulties no matter how worst they are even sleeping on road side or near gutters…these ppl do it…..so how can you not with much better facilities….
stand up, start saving, become extreme cheapstakes! even tell ur friends or close ppl with pride of what u do to survive….there r tonns of videos on internet now how to manage each shit! living 10 days on 10 dollars with happy face is not a dream now. im real!!!!you can watch ppl in many nations already doing it for centuries…..in my country pakistan i see beggers enjoying soft drinks, cheap burgers and alot of things…there are free food distributors at many sites for old and low income ppl, even some cheap food houses that offer a one time food as low as 0.1 dollars!!!!! i’m sure there might be such places in your countries, find them and save you left over money by secretly opting for free things provided for needy ppl to save your identity and self respect in society. maybe i’m wrong about free things, but there are possibilities to save and prolong much more than you can think of specially when you have no dependents….your countries offer great support from government for dependents as well, not the same for asian/african countries, dependants also rely 100% on family guardian.
i hope it helps blow some life into those who are very hopeless.
I just read every comment here and the ones talking about ending their lives brought me to tears. I’ve thought about it myself, but I still have enough savings that should tide me over for another six months. I’m living with my sister, but still need to pay rent to her because there is no way she could keep this place otherwise.
I am 46 and lost my job a year ago because – get this one – I took off “too much time” after the death of my mother. What amazes me is that my boss kept telling me to take off whatever time I needed. He even suggested a leave of absence! But, I didn’t take him up on that. Maybe I should have. I really liked it there and for the first time, felt like I found my ideal job that I could stay with for many years to come. I get calls for many phone interviews and have had quite a few face to face interviews. Honestly, though, none of these jobs have excited me even though they are in my area of expertise.
I’ve exhausted unemployment benefits, have used up my severance pay (they only gave me 2 months), and am now dipping into my savings and very small 401(K). I figure “what the heck, you’ll have to work until you die anyway, so use the damn 401K.”
I feel that applying for jobs on the Internet has made things worse. It’s way too easy to click a button and apply to a job that perhaps people would think twice about applying to if they actually had to type up an envelope, print out their cover letter and resume, put a stamp on it, and mail it. So, the Internet has caused an over abundance of resumes being sent to companies.
Networking is for the birds. I have never ever been offered a job or even an interview by knowing someone who works at the company. I also think Linked In is a crock of b.s. I can’t believe people put all of their information and previous jobs on a website like that! Maybe companies should try hiring by just doing phone interviews. What do they have to lose? You are on a three month trial period at most companies anyway where they can let you go if it’s not working out. I do great on phone interviews, but not that good on face to face interviews.
It’s a scary world out there. I hope and pray all of us will make it through!
I have read through all of these comments and my heart is breaking. Ageism is so so rampant, and the despair from long-term unemployment is like that from a war – always under stress, always having to watch every move and every penny.
I can understand the lack of hope. It is very valid. And TOTALLY not the fault of the unemployed. It is a systemic problem.
I’ve often thought of starting a business that leverages the talents of the unemployed. It could be a marketplace only for the long term unemployed and people over 45.
What do you think? I would love to hear from you.
How would you structure such a marketplace? How would compensation work? I envision attracting both contract and full time positions, and somehow having a coding system whereby those who need it the most would be listed at top. And your name would float to the top the longer you had been in the system, to the point where employers would be forced to hire those in the system the longest.
Please post your ideas. I won’t respond to email.
I’m 58 and male, I’ve been through it all and I’ve seen it all. As a result of the last 10yrs I’ve lost everything and that includes my family and even some of my closest friends. I’ve seen other fathers take their lives because they simply didn’t understand how to navigate this and that equates to children without their father. I’ve seen friends lose their entire businesses (and their livehood) because their bank was taken over. I’ve experienced bias and judgement as a result of my financial losses and now bad credit by employers and potential employers.
The entire crisis makes me angry, very specifically at the banks and wall street for their lack of respect and the level of greed, the amount of damage they have created has no real number to it, because it encompasses so many different elements, that, it’s hard begin to explain it, and most people to fully comprehend. The good news is that I never gave up, I’m finally working again, but it’s not what I’m used to and when you do the math, I’m still very poor, but, I don’t care about money anymore, I’ve found out through this process that “things” and “money” don’t make you happy.
From all of this however my biggest disappointment is in “people” and how they have bought into the American narrative, and as a result, how they judge and how often they discriminate. That is the most disappointing.
My life is much different these days, but I’m happy regardless.