So what’s up with this Man Cave concept? Is it a place for men to hide out in their own homes? The millennial version of the 1960s paneled private club, or a place to escape before being sent to the proverbial Dog House thus avoiding a tiff with the Missus?
Man Cave, a concept whose time has come
There are numerous varieties of man cave. A small den, filled with paraphernalia from college days, decorated in the rah-rah-raucous colors of a favorite sport, beer bottles as accessories, or mounted fish as art. Maybe there’s a poker table, worn leather furnishings. (The scent of Old Spice?)
Is there a problem with that?
So do you crave the scoop on the Man Cave? Check out Man Cave World. It’s enlightening – and funny!
As for dress code? I’m thinking it isn’t designer. Sorry, Armani. Damn, and I love what you’re showing in menswear this year.
Woman cave?
Do women have their versions of the Man Cave?
The boudoir? The kitchen? Do some husbands consider the entirety of the shared abode the “woman’s place” and are they staking claim to some small area to call their own – undecorated and unscrutinized? Might this explain the Living Together – Separately phenomenon?
Mens’ Fashion for the Man Cave
Are specific men’s fashions required for the Man Cave – t-shirts to match the Mardi Gras colors of LSU? I’d like to imagine some form of fashion sensibility coordinated with moose heads and poker chips, the mascot tiger theme inlaid in wall-to-wall.
Designer trends we may not see?
Rugged preppy, a jolt of color in fitted sweaters. . . ah, such beautiful stuff (that is no doubt more welcome in the woman cave).
Global trend, Man’s new best friend?
Any input from other countries? Allô, la France? England? Australia?
Is the Man Cave purely an invention of the long-married husband? Is it like the 7-year itch? The mid-life crisis vehicle to bask in, sans wheels?
Do men need their territories, their private spaces, their Keep Out signs when it comes to a female’s (theoretical) inclination to control the shared nest?
Man Cave Decorating Trends
If we accept the inevitability of the Man Cave as a necessity to happy marriage, might we at least recognize the telltale signs when they begin to appear, so we may leave the sanctity of the space intact?
Here are a few:
- Sports paraphernalia
- Big screen TV
- Games and gadgets
- Fridge for beer, grill nearby
- Clashing colors
Does Roger Federer have a Man Cave? Andrei Agassi?
I am loathe to admit that I have been unable to keep my eyes open to watch much Australian Open Tennis live. Fortunately it’s still early round play. But I wonder – does Roger Federer have a Man Cave?
Perhaps he hasn’t been married long enough. What about Andrei Agassi? He and Steffi Graf have been a couple for years. What might Andrei’s Man Cave look like?
- Does your hubby have a Man Cave?
- Does he need one?
- Do you need him to have one?
More than a look, a lifestyle?
As for the Man Cave concept, is it more than passing fashion, and a return to marital separate but equal, though unequal? A place for beer swilling, loud guffaws, arm wrestling and dart throwing, web surfing and guy talk? A (male) room of one’s own?
Gentlemen – I’m all for whatever makes you happy. Just don’t decorate my salon after your fave football team, ok ? Now as for those designer outfits, some of them are hot. A sharp blazer, a fitted sweater, just the right jeans. Of course, then you may have to come out of your Man Cave. For a little mix and mingle.
Fashion week images, various Google sources
© D A Wolf
I never fell into the whole man cave concept. It feels like your hiding, or that your hiding something. And the house being the “women’s place?” Well that just didn’t happen. When the house would be repainted or changed I would be involved, and we would figure out a good look for the both of us. It makes the whole home become both of yours. And you share in it.
Man caves are necessary if you don’t like sharing.
What would Virgina Woolf think, I wonder, about a room of a man’s own?
Your post reminds me that I want to read Andre Agassi’s memoir. If and when I do, I’ll let you know if he reveals anything about a man cave chez Graf-Agassi.
Man cave? I think it’s kinda immature really. I mean if you share a home, what’s wrong with your family room/study/living room – whatever it is why must it be an homage to men? Is the idea to stay out of sportsbars? Somehow I dont see that happening so I say keep the sportsbar at the sportsbar – and not your home.
I will say – I know one long-married couple who appear to cohabit quite nicely, having raised their family and continuing in their life together. Over the past few years, the Man Cave slowly created (quite hysterically) of the den has become a veritable homage to the husband’s home town football team. Tacky as hell, it nonetheless is wildly clever, very funny, incredibly cozy, and he clearly delights in his time spent there watching sporting events. Personally, as I have toured aforementioned Man Cave, and seen the pleasure he takes in continuing to embellish, it’s hard not to smile. I think (secretly) his wife smiles, too.
It seems a bit old-fashioned to me. But every couple works things out a bit differently. If some guys have the money and the extra room and their partner agrees, cool. Or….one might consider it an alternative to the “time out” chair. Go to your cave!
OMG. You’re too funny Elizabeth! Go to your cave, indeed!
i thought women had the original cave 😉
Ah, a true connoisseur, at last…
i have a cage in my house for my dog. she is a well behaved 110 pound greater swiss mountain dog.
when she was a puppy, i started telling her ‘cave’ as the word to send her into the cave, to this day that is what she does. when i need her in the cage, i tell her ‘Lucy cave’ and she runs for the cage and in. visitors think it is a hoot.
Between me and our four collective daughters (ages 6-13), I can understand my fiance’s desire for a man cave in the next house we buy. That said, my bedroom/bathroom comprises the 3rd floor of my house, so I can easily banish children when the need arises. I never feel the need to banish my guy because he likes quiet and personal space as much as I do.
We have a man-cave. Fully equipped with pool table, big-screen telly, beer fridge. I let my husband have full decorative license down there. Thus: purple walls, purple and green bar lights, red couches. It looks like an Indian whorehouse down there.
Your description of the color scheme is … um … inspired.
I love the idea of a man-cave, as long as it is immaculately clean at all times and doesn’t smell like a bar. Ewww… stale beer and ashtrays. So, therefore, there will probably never be one in my house, unless the man is a neat freak, or we can afford a house cleaner to keep it nice and tidy.
I think the garage should be the man cave.
Laughing! Garage or basement? (Actually, the man cave I mentioned is very clean and not cluttered – simply – um – very explicitly man-cavely. It’s quite a hoot, with its very “special” personalized décor and color scheme. I suspect his wife cleans it for him!)
No man cave here. Of course, it’s hard to have a man cave in an apartment.
I am not against a man cave, as long as I have my woman cave. His will be stuffed with a pool table, a big screen for football parties, and other paraphernalia. Mine will be crammed with a bed (for an uninterrupted nap), a computer (for blogging and writing), a tv (to watch movies on), and a humongous bookshelf, a comfy overstuffed chair, a blanket, and a fireplace (for when I want to sit down and cozy up to a book).
Thinking about it makes me smile.
I don’t have a man cave. I don’t have the space for one, but even if I did, I wouldn’t have one. However, I know why lots of men have them; they generally allow their wives to do whatever they want to the rest of the house, and they feel they need a place that is entirely theirs. They’re content as long as they have that one little spot they can be themselves without the wife nagging at them. I don’t really have that problem so I don’t care to have a man cave. I’ve always thought the man cave was really nothing more than an attempt to get away from ones wife. I want to get away from mine sometimes too, but I just go out for a while if that’s the case.
I could only dream of a man cave, where I could stick my husband for all of his interminable football games, and the kids too, and I could have some peace and quiet in the rest of the house. There could be distinct advantages to having the beer-guzzling, football-watching crowd confined to a small area in the house and the rest of the house actually fit for human beings.
My first thought of a man cave was a place where a man could relax, sit in his skivvies if he was so inclined. A place where the wife wouldnt dust around him. A place where they could cheer on a game without being shushed.
I am sure that the decor stems from not only mans favorite team colors but also because it clashes with flowers and mauve… the things that men shudder but say ‘yes dear’ to.
I would hope to be in a relationship where the decor, colors, and noise level appealed to us both.
We have never had a man cave, but in every house we’ve lived in the last 10 years I’ve had a craft room that is mine alone. Would you consider that the same sort of thing? If we ever have a large enough house, he has always wanted a game room complete with pool table, I guess that would then be his man cave? Although he has great taste and always has a say in our decor, so I wouldn’t have to worry about tackiness. Plus I would be invited, so maybe it wouldn’t fit the definition after all.
A man cave is anywhere a man can retreat in privacy and think things through. It might be his garage, or his garden, or a den. Decorating a specific place isn’t a requirement. My man cave is my bike – I cycle when I want to get away and process stuff.
I love the man cave thing—Batman finally admitting he misses his mommy without actually admitting it (or admitting any girls into his Honeycomb hideout).
In my man cave we talk about cooking and girls are just as welcome as boys. The only rule is that it’s cool to be kind and that’s not even a rule, more like a talking point.
Namaste