Take one smidge of Kathy Griffin, add a dollop of Robin Williams, then a sprinkling of George Carlin.
What do you get? A personal mix of madness, and a loopy laugh track based on… what?
I find each of these comedians to be funny, or have, at different points in my life. But my sons’ humor? Another matter. One of my boys loves quirky parables and wordplay. The other finds cartoons and mimicry hilarious.
How did that happen?
What do kids find funny and why?
The arm bone’s connected to the… funny bone…
How to explain the differences in my sons’ humor – that one loves comic strips and physical comedy, while the other goes for more intellectual fare – brain teasers and smart sarcasm? It’s been that way since they were little, yet they were raised in the same household, are close in age, and the same gender.
I used to think humor was purely learned and cultural, but having my own kids has shown me otherwise. Is humor genetic? Is it nature or nurture? Or utterly inexplicable?
Icons of sixties and seventies sitcoms
Thinking back to my childhood, I recall my dad listening to Mel Brooks and Bill Cosby on LPs (yes, vinyl) and I remember a great deal of affectionate teasing at family gatherings. Humor was part of the household, with heavy emphasis on puns and double-entendres, with more than a bit of bawdier fare by adolescence.
While some of my friends enjoyed the Stooges, I couldn’t stomach them and still can’t. But Mary Tyler Moore, Dick Van Dyke, a curmudgeonly Carl Reiner or Ed Asner – for me, irresistible. I also remember George Carlin, and the late 70s antics of John Belushi, Gilda Radner, Dan Akroyd and other talents with lines ingrained in my memory. (Landshark!) Then there are a handful of deadpan (word-oriented) French comics who leave me laughing breathlessly.
Where does humor come from?
But I still wonder, where does sense of humor come from?
Cultural influences – family, friends, books, films, schooling – all contribute to our perspectives in everything. And knocking them, mocking them, turning them inside out and highlighting their peculiarities – those form our humor hot spots, and become our humor heritage. 
But how do you explain siblings from the same household with dramatically different styles of humor? One who likes slapstick and another who manipulates words? The prankster and the mimic? Is the proverbial funny bone as individual and mysterious as one child’s talent for math and another’s gift for art? Are we in some way predisposed to find certain things amusing?
Laugh until you cry
In tough times, humor keeps us afloat. All hands on deck, all bodies on board, and there are plenty of styles to choose from. For some of us, our romantic choices are more influenced by funny than money; shared laughter is essential.
Good thing, too. On a bad day, a wacky blog post, great stand-up, or a clever commercial can be just what the doctor ordered, without having to file an insurance claim! As for the funny bone actually being a humor gene? Why not?
Currently unable to pursue this area of research (tipsy or otherwise), I’ll just settle for enjoying those times when my children and their friends fill the house with laughter, whatever the reason, even adult humor – precocious devils that they are. And, um… the fact that I allowed my kids to watch South Park when they were quite young surely has nothing to do with their advanced forays into humoristic realms. Hey – those spunky little characters are equal opportunity offenders…
So where do kids get their sense of humor?
- Do you have funny kids?
- Do you have funny pets?
- Are they funny with you or with others?
- Can you tell where they get their humor from?
- What fills your home with laughter?
My redheaded boy comes up with the most bizarre things. He is very, very literal and so joking around with him tends to be a bit of a highwire act.
My oldest is starting to get a really intelligent, rather dry wit that I am finding most delightful when it is turned on her father and brother. Sadly for me, she seems to find most success in this house teasing her mother instead.
What are you doing up this late, Girlfriend?? (Insomnia rules!!) Yes, dry wit. Oh you lucky thing. (To be enjoyed with a dry wine, and some fine cheese. Let them eat cake. You have the wine and cheese.)
One of my kids is funny and the other really isn’t (although he thinks he is). I’m the one in the family who’s naturally funny. My wife on the other hand is one of those people who can never deliver a punch line. It’s like a George Bush affliction or something — the words are all there to make a funny joke, but it bombs anyway. I’m guessing it’s genetic. My mom is naturally funny and we have a very similar sense of humor. I can see my younger son taking after me in that respect too.
Maybe it’s commonplace in marriages, but I have found that my extraordinary sense of humor is wasted on mi esposa: she never hears a word of my brilliant wit. I throw out creative puns and playful images and nothing happens.
Early on I would repeat my lines until acknowledged. I’ve quit doing that. I throw it out once and enjoy the rare response if it comes. If not, I save it for another audience.
I think humor comes from your childhood- if you grew up in a home where laughter was encouraged or conversely if you grew up in a home where things were really bad and laughter was the only way to get out of it…
I love Kathy Griffin! She’s my favorite 🙂
My mom and I have the same twisted, dark sense of humor. My dad is totally different–he likes slapstick stuff like the old Laurel&Hardy movies.
My kids like to laugh, but they’re young enough to really like silly stuff. Not sure how it’s going to evolve…
LOVE South Park!
All my kids are funny in different ways. My pets (kittens and a big dog who gets bullied around by them) are funny. I actually got a funny booty call last night. Does that count? LOL!
I think humor is a combination of intelligence, personality, maturity (the very young aren’t developmentally able to “get” humor) and preference. But what do I know. I can find humor in a fire truck! I love all kinds of humor except the kind that is done at other’s expense.
Humor and the ability to laugh are pre-requisite for any relationship I hope to be involved in. Not that you asked…but if I can’t laugh with that special person then what is there?
I have always said that laughter is gold. Pure gold.
But what makes each of us laugh? And why?
What a fascinating question. I am never given this much thought – why my sisters and I had – and have – very different senses of humor. I imagine it comes down to a hybrid of nature and nurture (nurature as I call it – stuff of a future post).
What amazes is that both of my girls – though very young – are funny. They crack us up. They crack other people up. I can’t yet tell whether they have the same sense of humor, but this will certainly be interesting to see.
Thanks for getting me thinking. As always.
My babes are still at a pretty elementary stage of humor development. For Big Boy, the big source of amusement at this point is things falling. He completely lost it in the supermarket this week when someone knocked over a display of watermelons in the produce section. (Oh wait, that *was* really funny.) For Tiny Baby, nothing sets him off as much as his dad pretending to be a wild dog attacking him. Oh, life with a toddler and infant.
I completely agree with previous posters that a sense of humor comes from the home environment, although I am fascinated by Aidan’s “nurature” idea as well. Both of my parents share a nerdy, sarcastic streak and elements of that have manifested themselves in me and my brothers.
Fun(ny) post!
Aha! The funny vs money becomes a bit clearer.
We are absolutely hysterical in this house, if you ask me. Well, it’s really my husband’s doing. He cracks himself up. There are certain days I desperately hope my boys will deem him nuts and find another sense of humor. Other days it is all I wish for…laughter to fill the house in any form.
I have never given much thought to what we find funny and why. For me I have to say it comes from my parents. My father was the king of dry wit. I miss it terribly. The joke about god and a dog at the dinner table when I was 10. Fucking priceless. And I always knew, before I could even understand his humor, that I should appreciate it. And I did. I do. Still.
If only I had that joke on camera. His stoic expression while telling it. And the relaxation in his face when it was over. And the smile that spread wide. It lightened my day, my week, my month. Every time.
I think my kids get their humor from me. I wasn’t a very funny person before they were born, but now that they are expressing themselves and entertaining us for hours, I realize that I once was a ham. Years and years ago, the funny part of me got covered up but I see it in them and they bring it back in me. Laughter fills my home now!
What a wonderful question. Nature vs. nurture anyone? I am of the class that both play a significant part in development. (Which means I can’t make up my mind.) My daughter isn’t old enough yet to crack jokes, but she sure cracks up at my jokes (or my laugh…).
In my family (remember 10 kids!!!), I have seen humor go both directions. Some of us are witty, others dry, others love slap stick, and still others just can’t deliver a punch line. If it is genetic, there are so many components of the genetic puzzle that could influence what direction one’s sense of humor goes. Each genetic trait can also be influenced by environment. A naturally funny kid of dry, dull parents could lose his humor through lack of use.
I could go on, but I think you get the idea : ). I am sure that you are a hilarious person. It comes out in your writing. I am sure your teens appreciate that.
As my younger son said when he was about nine, “It’s all funny until someone loses an eye… and then it’s hilarious!”
The older one loves to laugh, but the younger one was just born smiling, literally, and has cracked us up steadily along the way.
I think it must be a combination of genetics (his grandfather wrote “Gus,” “Hot Lead and Cold Feet,” {a Don Knotts masterwork} and “Herby Goes to Monte Carlo”) and nurture—my wife screening Buster Keaton, and Monte Python for him at a very early age.
Don’t know where humor comes from, but I’m grateful to Billy Wilder who said, “Life is terrible, but it’s not that serious.”