Love, thy name is business. Let me count the ways.
I’ve been thinking about the Love Biz, musing over my history and wondering about my future, even as I’ve canceled out of Match.com yet one more time. Yep, after following the rules of its 6-month guarantee.
Love, clearly, isn’t just big biz. It’s gargantuan. It extends far beyond internet dating, or the mountain of self-help books and sites on finding love, sustaining it, or getting over it.
How many industries, many of them recession-proof, are fueled by this simple thing called love? And how many billions of dollars does the Love Biz really account for?
…
A handful of products & services, off the top of my head:
(Note: not the sex biz, just love.)
- Online dating.
- Fashion, cosmetics, perfumes.
- Cosmetic surgery – now teens, young women, and men.
- Weight loss products and services.
- Greeting cards, gifts.
- Flowers, jewelry.
- Counseling, addressing lack of self-love.
- Counseling, addressing no love or love-gone-wrong.
- Films, music, photography.
- Self-help books, advice sites.
- Romance novels, literary works.
- Bars, dance clubs.
- Clergy and civil servants to marry us.
- A vast wedding/hospitality industry to do so with panache.
- A vast legal profession, for divorce and its aftermath.
- Communication services for all of the above.
- Advertising for all of the above.
Romeo and Juliet – Can you hear me now?
How much of all communications are driven by the Love Biz, talk of love, or lovebirds online? What if Romeo and Juliet had iPhones, Facebook, and Twitter? Just another teen romance, and breakup?
I’m as happy as the next girl to receive a long stem rose. Lingerie and shoes? You already know my thoughts. In many respects, the Love Biz hasn’t changed. But it is broader and deeper, more available, more visible, in more media, and more technology-driven.
All that’s good for the economy! But is it good for our spirits, or our relationships? And what impact is it having on our children?
Consider:
Esteem issues, eating disorders, boob jobs, nose jobs, teeth brighteners, tummy tucks, Botox, rapidly discarded partners, multiple remarriages (and confused kids) – that’s just scratching the surface of where we are.
With all the “help” that’s accessible, are we any happier in love?
Or are we buying into so many requirements that whatever we do is never enough, and whatever we have, we’re never satisfied?.
…
I have come to a place in life where I see a difference between romantic love and Love. The former leads to attachments. In our desire to attain those things, money is spent. It’s big business, like you say. The other Love is what connects us all together. It’s free, always there, and you have an endless source of it in your heart to give.
ha, i just let my match.com guaranteed dating expire too.
good comment dad. I think love is something that we figure out over time and that changes with time. People, places and even things can inspire love.
love is also a business for many people, i recently had an interview with a company that is involved in online dating!
How do you teach your children about love, when you have a difficult time with the children’s other parent? I guess it shows that there are different kinds of love? You both are much further along in this than I am. I truly appreciate your open discussions about your experience and I feel like I have really benefited and enjoyed reading what you have written and the comments and community that is being inspired.
Life is a journey, often what happens next cannot be predicted or planned for. Now, my challenge, is to turn this newfound knowledge into successful meeting and dating of a new woman or women
Happy Labor Day!
How do you teach your children about love when you have a difficult time with the other parent? It’s a great question.
I guess those of us who are veterans find other ways. If the exchanges with the other parent are infrequent or always contentious, you go out of your way to bring other sorts of love into your kids’ lives. Friendship love, grandparent love, aunt & uncle love, role model love. And if you’re lucky, you have a relationship or two that are serious enough that they can see how you are when you are in love, and when you are treated with love. That’s all good stuff for kids to see. And maybe they begin to understand why their parents are no longer together. Because that richness of affection, respect, and playfulness wasn’t there between them.
Don’t worry. I really believe that when you love your kids, you always find a way to do your best for them. Not perfect – no such thing. But your best, all the same.
I don’t think any of it takes away from their loving either parent.