Here’s what I’d like to know. Why does fruitcake get such bad press? I love fruitcake. Anyone who wants to send me a fruitcake of any sort (well, almost any sort) – please do. The more neon the artificially enhanced fruit – the better! Now I happen to know that The Kitchen Witch, a very fine chef, has different ideas. But I think it’s time we discuss this highly politicized holiday issue.
Just a matter of PR?
While I realize I probably shouldn’t eat fruitcake, or anything that is heavy enough to be used as a discus, I nonetheless enjoy gastronomically festive foods. Besides, without preservatives, mightn’t the fruit rot or the impressive shelf life be shorter?
And I’m nuts over nuts. Pecans, almonds, walnuts, pine nuts. Add dried and candied fruits, and then liqueur? Mmmm.
Yes, it’s dense. Yes, it’s sweet. Yes, it’s… ponderous. Still, if it’s a tasty fruitcake, eccentric though it may be, I’m hooked.
Fruitcake facts
Here are some fanciful facts about the much maligned fruitcake and a few of the reasons I love it.
- Some sources trace variations of the fruitcake back to the times of the Egyptians, and fruitcake was certainly around in the Middle Ages. Doesn’t that make it historic? A classic, like the little black dress?
- The shelf life of a fruitcake may be two or even three years – and I don’t mean for dead Pharaohs. Think of the re-gifting possibilities. What’s not to love about that?
- American fruitcake recipes can be documented as far back as 1824, according to About.com, with recipes that include some 9 pounds of fruit and nuts.
- The ingredients are as lavish and colorful as a big box of crayons! Fruitcake is a potpourri of sugary, squishy and otherwise crunchy stuff, including raisins, currants, almonds, pineapples, cherries, pecans, alcohol, corn syrup… a health food, no?
- Many fruitcakes are provided by Trappist monks from Oregon to Georgia. Their bakeries (and fruitcake revenues) furnish financing to the monasteries. Hell, I’m feeling more spiritual about my Christmas fruitcake already.
- The record for consumption of this chock-full-of-nuts confection was set in 2001 by Sonya Thomas, who downed 4 lbs and 14 oz in 10 minutes. (UGH.)
- Takeru Kobayashi – record holder for (competitive) consumption of hotdogs and a number of other foods – attempted to better Thomas’ accomplishment in December 2008, and couldn’t do it!
- What other holiday food has its own sporting event? If you receive one of those fruitcakes (the pallid, chalky, neon-lit, or led-weighted variety) – no worries! There is a fruitcake tossing event that’s been around for years – the Annual Manitou Springs Fruitcake Toss!
Fruitcake fun or fruitcake fail?
Personally, I’ve had fruitcake from Harry and David (delicious), and my grandmother’s was divine (possibly provided by Trappist monks). Am I nuttier than a fruitcake for admitting that? Perhaps. But I stand by my convictions. I love fruitcake, though I’m even fonder of the lighter, breadier German cousin, the Christmas stollen.
Now, to quote The Kitchen Witch, whose recipes I admire as much as her prose:
“The only redeeming thing about fruitcake is that it is steeped in hard liquor.”
From that remark, I gather that TKW is on the fruitcake sucks side of this debate. So, any felicitous fruitcakes on your holiday table, or are you heading to Colorado to find your “weight class” and toss your cake into the ring?
super fun post about the fruitcake. it is that time of year. my dad loves fruitcake. I don’t. maybe I just haven’t had the right one.
Reaching for my barf bag…….and booking a trip to Manitou Springs…
Four lbs of fruit cake! Holy cow! That’s incredible. I’m with you, I love fruitcake too. I haven’t had one in years though. people don’t give them as presents anymore. Maybe I need to go get one now that you mention it!
Nope, not a fan here. Too much going on for my taste. I feel like fruit cake was some sort of experiment gone bad.
I think it is really easy to fuck up, and that’s why it gets a bad rap.
I just realized I have never in my life eaten fruitcake.
You guys are cracking me up. But you really must read Kitch’s “con” side of the question. And do link to the Fruitcake Toss document. It’s astonishing – there are all sorts of rules and weight classes and it’s been going on for 15 years. Serious fun – clearly. Now – as to the fact that you’ve never had a fruitcake, perhaps you need to put that on your list, and ask for a tasty one. Monk-made. Or, start lighter with stollen (there is a bakery near me which makes the lightest, most delicious stollen on the planet). Definitely worth it. Surely you can find that. Just remember – you want Christmas stollen, not Christmas stolen.
Oh – and don’t forget Pumpkin Chuckin’!
This International Rutabaga Curling World Championships are being held right here in Ithaca NY today!
http://www.theithacajournal.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=2009912150367
I love fruit cake. Prefer it soaked in a good brandy but other liquors will do. I am a huge date fan so like one with lots of dates in it. 🙂 Off to stuff more drunken dates!
I haven’t had fruitcake in years… but my mother in law just gave us a loaf and told us it had to age a few weeks.
I’ve never known a cake that had to age.
I’m a little leary.
Oh dear. Well, there’s good news and more good news. First, that means you don’t need to taste it right away. And secondly, it might be ideal for Manitou Springs, first Saturday in January. . . (just don’t tell her that part).
GREAT topic. 😉
My ex makes this amazing British fruitcake, with marzipan. Only he’s not making it this year. Part of our Christmas tradition, brunch with the kids, bites the dust.
Only the kids won’t eat it. They would have starved during dessert in the Middle Ages. I make stollen in memory of my mother, who used to make it around this time. But I have to admit, Trader Joes does a mean stollen with marzipan. Good for snowy afternoons. Try it during the next blizzard, you who get blizzards.
I was reading about British fruitcake. I don’t think I’ve ever had any. Can you get it here?
I had a Greek roommate in college whose mother used to make a fruitcake-type thing she called a “Hoppy Bishop” (and I, of course, called a “Hoppy Rabbi”…) I liked it, but, of course, I like anything that has the word “cake” in it.
Here’s a recipe like the one my ex makes. Another name is British Christmas cake.
I’ve never seen it sold, but the Trader Joe’s stollen comes fairly close.
http://www.nibblous.com/recipe/378
Goes as well with tea as it does with coffee.
I love fruitcake, but I think I’m the only one left in my family who does. When I visit my sister over Christmas, she always has a small fruitcake for me, bless her.